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mandy-low @blogspot.com ♥
Saturday, May 15, 2010


This scene... Just remind me so much of what Allen's been saying to me lately. Difference is... I guess Allen didnt have a super powered bad guy forcing him to tell me all those to hurt me... Or maybe the bad guy is within Allen himself.. Said he had a new girl... Said he fell in love... Said that our love is no more... Told me that its over and that there's NO WAY we can fix things.. Told me he's happy...

She's his happy now... And i used to be his happy..
He was my happy.. And he's still my happy... =(
But he doesnt want me to... Says that my happy isnt with him anymore...
I screwed up... but im working on it...
Well, what can i say.. The odds are against me...


And im trying to be as noble as i can be...
But i dont want to pretend and i dont want to force nobility out of me...
Alot of you out there may think that if you love the person.. Let him go...
You guys watch too fucking much dramas and movies...
Real life isnt like that... You fight for the shit you want...
You snooze you lose and when you regret it.. Its too late...
I just dont wanna regret... And maybe im being selfish now...
But we all fight to hurt less... And im fighting cos it hurts lesser when i do...


Until my heart is convinced that our love meant nothing much...
Until it is convinced that my relationship with Allen should be put to the back of my head...
Ill stay afraid of forgetting him and ill stay afraid of losing him entirely in my life...


And none of you fuckers out there stop me cos you'll just piss me off...


Fateha said something like this today
"im not supporting you.. Neither am i discouraging you. I just here to walk this journey with you"
Ill wake up. one day...
And i would appreciate if you guys who love me stand by me...
Watch me play. If i lose, just be there...
If i win.. It'll be because you guys stood by me all the way..
So you guys dont stand to lose... Just let me do this...

On a lighter note... Graduation pictures up soon. =)