tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67592532011-12-13T13:12:52.036+08:00SUICIDAL ...Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.comBlogger8321100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-61475493674996055862011-12-13T13:12:00.000+08:002011-12-13T13:12:52.045+08:00<span style="color: black;">Sometimes I wonder what I mean to people around me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Am I important? Do my words and actions have an impact at all in your life?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Or am I just a passing cloud? </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Even for those who I am close with and believe for sure they do truly love and care for me...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I still wonder if I mean anything... Do they just enjoy spending time with me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If I'd leave suddenly would they miss me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Would they cry for days and days hoping I'll come back?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I mean, I feel important when I'm with them...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But when I'm not, I feel like I'm easily forgotten...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Am I? Easily forgotten?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I think my self-esteem has gotten so low I put no worth to myself..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I don't see how important I can be to anyone...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Aryani, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fateha, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Harris, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Iskandar, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Danny, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">TK, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Logen, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Ais, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Vanessa, Who am I to you? </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">G, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Y, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">J, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">B, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">E, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">S, Who am I to you?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">A, Who am I to you?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So easy to categorize.. Im either a friend.. A good friend.. Close friend.. Best friend.. Girl friend... or wtv..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But who am I in your heart? What place do I hold? Would I ever be replaced? Would you care if i told you every day I'm not ok... And believe that I'm not ok? OR would you be cynical? And tell me you understand but actually inside you're thinking " Bleah.. She'll pull thru.. She's just beinga&nbsp; drama queen..."</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Why is it so impt? because we all live for something/someone...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and i dun see myself living for anything.. Except what I mean to others...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">The day I mean nothing to everybody.. The day I have lietrally nothing to live for...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We all need someone... I just need everyone who I love to need me too...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Is it crazy? This need to be needed? </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... Grow Up Mandy... =(</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6147549367499605586?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-74297502511972743562011-12-09T12:41:00.000+08:002011-12-09T12:41:45.536+08:00<span style="color: black;">Everything's going haywire...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Or at least it feels like it is..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">My world revolves around thai disco and alcohol nowadays..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Spending money like it's easy to earn..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Everything's wrong, no matter how right people keep telling me it is...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">It feels wrong.. Something is missing... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Feels like once again, there's nothing to live for...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I dun wanna whine.. I dun wanna rant...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos it's pointless... I either give up, or I bite the bullet and move on...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">There's no 3rd option... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I hate myself... Ever feel like the biggest enemy to yourself is yourself?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im my baddest ass judge for myself.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Everything i do is wrong to myself..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I cant help it... Neither can anyone else...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">And recently, it feels like no one really cares enough to help me out of this dump im in.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Either I'm not shouting for help loud enough, or they just pretend not to hear me.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos im a mess... And why would anyone wanna be in this mess with me?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I need help... I need the kinda help that helps you out of dumps like this... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I have no hope, no faith and no nothing in anything...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If there's a god... You would do everyone a favour...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And just take me away from the surface of this earth...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Where ever else... Doesnt matter... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanna fall asleep tonight and never wake up...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Screwing every fucking little thing up...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Nothing i do is ever good enough for myself...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fuck laa...</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-7429750251197274356?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-80706716069722406272011-11-29T07:55:00.000+08:002011-11-29T07:55:48.456+08:00So, the quit binge drinking thing?<br />Didn't work out very well..<br />It was starting to work.<br />Then i had a argument with my mum and my brother again...<br />Then i went back to binge drinking...<br /><br />Binge drinking isn't so bad..<br />Its the situations i put myself into after/during the drinking that sucks.<br />I learnt so much about myself through this...<br />And it didn't help me love myself better..<br />I just realize more reasons why I really don't like myself... :(<br /><br />If i go into details...<br />I can only imagine the names your mind would start to register me as...<br />So i shall not...<br />But for those who give a shit...<br />Please know I'm trying.. I'm trying hard as hell not to run...<br />Trying to be the grown up i'm supposed to be...<br /><br />But the first sign of trouble and stupidity... I run...<br />My mind registers abandonment and running away as the first option to everything...<br />I keep trying and i keep failing...<br />I'm only 21 and i feel like i don't have much faith or hope left to live the rest of my life.<br />You guys have no idea how scared i am sometimes...<br />How alone i feel, how afraid i am of the next stupid thing ill do...<br />Just for 1 moment of pure happiness...<br />Doesn't matter if regret comes later.<br />Doesn't matter if i know people are just using me...<br />Doesn't matter if i know its a mistake...<br /><br />Just one moment of happiness..<br />And ill willingly put myself in the situation.<br />Then comes the after effect...<br /><br />I'm just so fucking depressed...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8070671606972240627?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com037 Pandan Rd, Singapore 6092801.300663 103.74591199999998-38.8709325 43.980286999999976 41.4722585 163.51153699999998tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-76483590320948464232011-11-15T13:17:00.000+08:002011-11-15T13:17:36.148+08:00<span style="color: black;">Taiwan was alright... Nothing special.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Given a choice I wouldnt go there again, unless it's all fully paid for again...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Pictures will be posted on facebook.. No point posting pictures up here any more cos it take a long time...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And nobody really reads this space anymore...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Past weekend was spent with Vanessa hanging out and partying...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Lots of drinking, lots of money spending, lots of emotions all over the place...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I realised I'm still so young... I get to do stupid things and feel stupid about teh stupid things I do.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I realised sometiems I try to hard to act mature and adult when all I want is to be a kid and act all childihs and lame... Not childish like jokingly... Like really childish...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">But life's like that nowadays.. Grow up or get eaten... :( Sucks...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Met the boys for play time at NEBO AMK HUB. Was fun... After which something happened and ended the night early... So guess where I went? I wen to drink with Vanessa again...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Where do we go? V4... V4 has managed to hooked us on for the past weekend. And it's proving difficult to stay away... Easier for me cos I'm kind of sick of it already... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno what I want in life.. I don't know what I'm doing...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">But right now, my goal is to quit smoking...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Second goal was motivated by Wilson &amp; Bryan to lose 1KG every week.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">IF it happens, by End of Feb I'll be of acceptable weight...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">1KG doesnt sound very difficult..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Wilson says all I have to do is 50 push ups, 50 sit ups &amp; 50 jumping jacks everyday... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Sounds easy? FUCK you... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'll never succeed... I always do thinsg halfway...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I always do it when I feel like and don't do it when I don't feel like...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'm that kind of loser... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... Work sucks... I wanna get out of this shithole I feel like I'm in.. :(</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-7648359032094846423?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-23991529170616961272011-10-31T11:36:00.000+08:002011-10-31T11:36:33.829+08:00<span style="color: black;">Yesterday was an emotional roller coaster.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I woke up happy and excited. Was going to meet Logen, head to Ais's house for Deepavali party, and have lots of fun. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">We were having lots of fun. Truth or Dare. Charades... Food... Been awhile since I have simple fun like this.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">No alcohol. Just pure simple lame fun... :) </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">In the midst of the day, I had to ignore lots of calls from someone I care for. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because I wasn't in the mood for lovey dovey and I just wanted 1 day... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I felt far away from all the problems in life... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">If I 'd had picked up the calls, I'll somehow be reminded of why I feel so alone...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I didn't wanna feel alone... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Yet I felt bad for leaving that person hanging...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos if I was on the other end of this situation, I'd feel fucked up...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But I was selfish, and I just didn't pick up the calls...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">=(</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then I had good talk with Logen, </span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he seems to be keen on the whole Work Holiday @ New Zealand...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So He'll be my buddy on this.. :) I was happy... Happy happy&nbsp;happy...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos I finally have a goal in my life... A realistic and reachable one...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then I rushed home to tutor Bryan in English...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I was late so we had 1 hour to do our tution...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Stumbled upon a question about South Pole...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And Bryan insisted that South Pole is a HOT place cos North Pole is the one that is COLD.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I explained to him about the 2 poles being cold because they are further from the Equator which is where the Sun is closer to.. Which is where Singapore is near...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He refused to listen, he went to ask Clarissa &amp; Wilson, that backed me up.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Bryan STILL refused to believer us...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Went to ask my mum, who said "I don't know"</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Went to ask my dad, who said "I think it's hot.. Not sure, go check.."</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So Bryan came in, shouted happily that my dad said "IT's hot"..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I went to Wilson's room, where Clar is googling it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And the internet says it's cold...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Bryan insist we are all wrong... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I was super frustrated by then... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">So I went to tell my dad and explained...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That's when my dad shouted and said</span><br /><span style="color: black;">"I said I think! And I said go and check lah IDIOTS!"</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then I got pissed off... And just left the room... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because my mum was asleep and arguing with my Dad,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I will always lose... Because I cannot argue with people I love...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I will cry, and they will take that as a sign of weakness...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So, I went back to my room with Bryan feeling all smug...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He brought the dictionary in and tried to search for South Pole.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I told him the dictionary won't have the answer...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Told him to Google it... He insisted that the dictionary has the answer...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I was to sick and tired to bother... Let him check...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He couldnt find the answer.. So he said "FINE! If you say cold then cold lor!"</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then I was so angry... So so angry... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">But I just kept quiet... And tears started to well up...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Not ebcause I was angry... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">But because I felt guilty... Because at that moment...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I hated my family... And I wanted to leave...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I felt bad that I wanted to leave... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanted never to be bothered by all of them ever again...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And as I was thinking about all the bad things I felt like saying to all of them...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I sat there, quiet, and tearing while Bryan finished his worksheet...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then he looked at me and said "It's 10 O'clock.. I gotta sleep.."</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He hasn't finished his work... But I have lost all mood to teach...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he just went to sleep...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I sat on my bed, trying to force back the tears...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I needed to smoke... I wanted to pack my bags...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Bring 2 huge luggage with me and just leave... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I don't care if I have to sleep on the streets or beg my friends to take me in for a few days...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanted to pack my bags, and leave...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">But I just sat there... Half wanting to leave, half thinking it's a bad idea...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That I've grown up... And if i blew up now... Lots of pple will get hurt...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I hated myself for what I hated at that point of time...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Bryan tossed and turned... He asked "Jie, are you crying?"</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I said No.. He asked again "Why you cry?"</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I said No... And off the lights, and went to bed...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Before I slept, I remember crying my lungs out...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos I had to keep the cries down.. But my heart felt ripped out of my heart...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I despised myself...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos I felt pathetic... I run at the thought of rejection/hatred...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">What is independence?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">=( Blogging about it makes me all teary eyed again... Which sucks, cos I'm at work now...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Work... Hais.. Don't get me started...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Taiwan trip this weekend... I'm not excited about it... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Although most of the stuff are all paid for...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'll prolly still have to spend... Plus, I think, I will want to drink alot there...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos, there's nothing else to do... With the people I'm going with...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Hais.... I'd rather drink myself to death than shop and spend money on things that I think looks nice...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I'd rather drink and&nbsp;have the chance to pretend to be drunk, than to&nbsp;pretend to be inetrested in the things they have to say about work...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So fucking sick of this office job... I think every day I hate myself a little more because I'm still doing this, for the sake of money.. Sometimes I wish I had the hippie thinking... Money and material possessions ain't important... Life is short.. Have fun... FUN YOUR FUCKING HIPPIE BRAIN!! Fun needs money, most of the time... Fuck balls, I just want a rich boyfriend/husband... So I dont have to work and have fun... can or not?? Can or fucking not??? </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">=(</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Im starting to blog like I'm talking to myself...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which means, I need to stop blogging.. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">BYE...</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-2399152917061696127?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-41988533463765014662011-10-30T12:51:00.001+08:002011-10-30T12:52:31.981+08:00<span style="color: black;">I have a plan for my near future...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And it involves at least 3 months away from Singapore...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I intend to apply for a Holiday Work Pass and go to New Zealand...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">This is to widen my circle of experiences and also, because... I just REALLY wanna go to New Zealand..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I don't mind doing factory work or being a waitress... I just want to get out of Singapore and experience a life on my own somewhere else.. Wilson says it's better if I have a friend to go with me.. But I dunno.. Somehow, I think maybe I should try doing it alone... Maybe I'll ask Logen if he wants to join me... But other than that... I think no one else in my life will be willing to do it with me... Or maybe Wilson wouldn't mind... :)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Well, Im bent on doing what I mentioned above. So, I've been looking up on the "immigration" procedures and the requirements. Seems like I fit the bill and all I have to do is apply and get all teh documentations ready. Buy the tickets.. And have enough money in my bank.. AND!! Im good to go! Hopefully .... Cos They still have to approve my application before I can go.. Cos they only approve 200 pple each year... Im hoping next year will be my lucky streak... So, please please please please PLEASE!!!!</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So that's the plan.. .Hopefully the impending recession doesnt rule out this plan. Cos my Dad was telling me that if the recession happens.. All this plan have to be shredded into pieces and I'd prolly have to stick with my current job... :( Which I would definitely not be happy about.. ButI'll survive... Sometimes situation does not permit you to be the person you want to be.. That's life... But HOPEFULLY! This time, life won't be such a bitch to me.. And finally let me step out of the conventional life.. Just for 3-12 months... That's all I ask of you... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So, I've been thinking... If this plan works out.. Who'd I miss and who'd miss me?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">My family definitely, top of the list...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">My close friends that I hang out with almost every other week.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Other friends whom I still occasionally hang out and talk to...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Colleagues that are now considered my friends cos I spend almost everyday with them...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">People who claim they like/love me...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">That's it...&nbsp;5 categories... I was lazy to name names.. and some names are sworn to secrecy...&nbsp;</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">My brother is really encouraging that I do this with a friend... But I dunno.. Not easy to find a friedn that would do something lidat with you...&nbsp;</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Ok, apart from that... I will talk to my friend about his journey on this Holiday&nbsp;Work Pass thing.. See what he says... And do more research on this... Propose a beautiful proposal to my parents about this adventure that I wanna take.. Convince them that I'll be safe and&nbsp;it's really what I want... Im quite sure&nbsp;they won't disapprove.. Cos I run it through them briefly last night and they didnt&nbsp;seem too disapproving.. They just said it might be a bad idea if the recession hits.. and&nbsp;they didnt ask much after that.. maybe cos they think I'm not serious about it...&nbsp;</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">But when everything is more or less settled.. And&nbsp;they think that Im serious about it.. Maybe their reaction will change. I dunno.. I trust my family to trust me... &nbsp;So anyways, speaking about that.. It means that, I have to save up tons and tons of money... LIKE TONS! </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So starting today, I will not binge drink... I will not CHIJMES around like Danny...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I will not spend much on food... CHeap hawker food and simple food is fine... Maybe once in a month pamper mysefl with good food... Not fine dining style but at least a nice steak or something.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Although I do not shop much, but once in awhile I do the occasional binge shopping.. So that has to stop too.. Buy what I need not what I want... For the rest of the things, cut down cut down cut down!!! Everything needs money nowadays.. So If I cut down my ciggarettes, I'd prolly save a whole lot too.. I'm at the stage where it's difficult to quit now.. Cut down? Sure can.. Quit? Maybe not... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So, The alcohol and the cigarettes are the main things I need to cut down/quit... Othe rthan that I would say I have been living frugally... OH YAH!!! I missed out one thing... Other than my impending trip to Hatyai... My Other impending trip to Phuket.. And my long planned trip to Gold Coast... I shall not plan any other holidays.. From now til Next year June.... I shall not plan any other holidays.. And save up for my long term New Zealand Holiday... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">If this doesnt work how? IF I don't get selected how?? I WILL FUCKING APPLY FOR THIS SHIT EVERY FUCKING YEAR TIL IM THIRTY!!! OR MARRIED WITH CHILDREN!!! Cos that's the criteria.. Cant be above 30.. Cant have kids.. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So, that;s my dream.. When I was young, my dream vacation was New Zealand.. Cos I think I remember seeing the most beautiful scenic picture of a place. And I asked my mum/dad where that was.. And they said New Zealand.. And KAPOW! My new favourite place.. And I&nbsp;remember everytime anyone asks me where I wanna go for holiday.. New Zealand was my first answer.. But I never got to go...&nbsp;</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Now that there's a possibility I can go for a loooong time... Without having to spend as much money as I thought would be needed... I will die for this shit!!! And I've never been very motivated to do stuff til the end.. I was always dropping out halfway or just smoking through all the things in my life.. &nbsp;But this? This I need to do it.. To prove to myself mostly.. That there <strong>IS</strong> something to live for</span><span style="color: black;">.. And that is to live for the happy moments in life.. Where you finally get to do what you want, the way you want it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Those who loves me and still reads this blog.. Please, hope for me... I havent been happy lately.. havent been excited over something in a long time... And I havent been motivated to do something about my happiness for a long time.. So PLEASE! It will make me very very happy.. If all of you support me in this and help me hope that I get this.. IF I&nbsp; get this... I'll be happy for the longest time in 3 years..... :)</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4198853346376501466?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-42772842238540100342011-10-28T13:17:00.000+08:002011-10-28T13:17:27.048+08:00<span style="color: black;">I had the mood to blogged just now. But after lunch, I lost all mood... But I just can't leave that thought hanging.. So here I am... Blogging...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So whaaaaaaazaaaaaaap? :)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Well, I have been asking myself plenty of life questions recently.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Starte dto question all the choices I made these past years.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And I came to the same conclusion I have had all these years...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I DON'T KNOW SIAAAAAA....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I think I'm being too hard up on myself.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'm young, I'm supposed to be able to make plenty of mistakes.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And the consequences are suposed to be so small that it won't affect much of my future...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And it's true, so far, nothing I did is so huge that my whole future is ruined.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But that doesnt mean one day, it won't happen...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">It just take 1 experience, too make it good enough to stick with my through out my entire life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And while I am pretty sure that if I continue on this path, I'll get there soon enough..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I can't seem to find any reason to change my path...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">What's my path? </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Simple, enjoy now, think later...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But the irony in that is, most of the time, after I enjoy..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I immediately or almost immediately feel stupid about it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Why? Because the things I enjoy aren't supposed to be enjoyed...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Danny and Harris have been saying that one day I'll get stomach cancer.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And it's nobody's fault when it happens, except mine...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">They are right... But when they said that... There was only one thing on my mind...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">"If one day, I really did get stomach cancer.. Will you guys still be there? Will you all still tell me the same old things you're saying to me? Will you feel sorry and sad for me?" </span><br /><span style="color: black;">And then I realized, I think I really do wanna know how everyone I love will react when one day, I'm finally dying..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they wanna spend every single moment of my dying days with me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they start telling me how much I mean to them?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they laugh and think that I'll be able to pull through it on my own?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they get angry at me and leave?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they start to realise that I'm too depressed and start distancing from me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they finally get sick of me and my problems and fuck care?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Will they listen to me cry while I tell them I wished this?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos I wished for it, I wished to die... At every low point of my life, I wished someone would take my life..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Stop all the crap and stop the loneliness, and stop the pain...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Selfish... Stupid... Immature... Cos wanting to die is the last thing anyone should do...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos we grew up being taught life is a precious thing...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But to me, life is just a life.. You either live it, or you don't...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I don't believe in afterlife, I don't believe in heaven or earth..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Death is like taking the weight off your shoulders..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You die? You disappear.. Simple...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">No lingering spirits, no rebirth, no heaven, no hell...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I believe in ghosts.. But, that's a whole different story.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Nothing to do with death... I think...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I feel a little depressed... But I keep telling myself that that's not it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im not depressed... Im just unhappy... I don't know what's the difference...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos it feels so much alike...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... Anyways, recently I start to feel like I need a change of environment...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I need to start something somewhere.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos maybe I'm just not happy where ever I am...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But it's so difficult to change things that's against the flow..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Either it's difficult, or I'm too lazy and demotivated...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe I'm addicted to sadness... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">It's like a natural instinctive feeling right now...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Every situation, I find a way to feel sad or any other negative feelings towards it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And it sucks...</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Work starts now.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">FML...</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4277284223854010034?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-68613330725021012862011-10-17T12:51:00.000+08:002011-10-17T12:51:48.476+08:00I spend the whole morning checking out funny and awesome pictures.<br />Cos I feel like shit today, and I don't fucking feel like working... <br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-smG4EYKwmO0/TputwhnrPmI/AAAAAAAABD8/dTY1uALeHeE/s1600/y2w5l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="217" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-smG4EYKwmO0/TputwhnrPmI/AAAAAAAABD8/dTY1uALeHeE/s320/y2w5l.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WIhvf7401Xc/Tputy95kf3I/AAAAAAAABEE/3Ad1KUByuws/s1600/ws4Ys.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WIhvf7401Xc/Tputy95kf3I/AAAAAAAABEE/3Ad1KUByuws/s320/ws4Ys.jpg" width="172" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Awwww.. Shoo Schweeet~~</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4DCP5kqBNXI/Tputz7UGR3I/AAAAAAAABEM/Rr1eUgKMTqk/s1600/4Cgyo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4DCP5kqBNXI/Tputz7UGR3I/AAAAAAAABEM/Rr1eUgKMTqk/s320/4Cgyo.jpg" width="249" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Mm79DJGdN0g/Tput24UPU7I/AAAAAAAABEU/Rtaha6Xn8pg/s1600/iqxKw.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Mm79DJGdN0g/Tput24UPU7I/AAAAAAAABEU/Rtaha6Xn8pg/s320/iqxKw.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MxJOmYz9SGg/Tput69nu2zI/AAAAAAAABEc/jCVQ-plqzOw/s1600/untitled.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MxJOmYz9SGg/Tput69nu2zI/AAAAAAAABEc/jCVQ-plqzOw/s320/untitled.bmp" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The first picture that made me laughed out loud.. LOL</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YYBQTyP9XyQ/Tput795_jZI/AAAAAAAABEk/rFPjZMKcXAk/s1600/crazy-parenting-fails-the-paranoid-parental-double-troll.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YYBQTyP9XyQ/Tput795_jZI/AAAAAAAABEk/rFPjZMKcXAk/s320/crazy-parenting-fails-the-paranoid-parental-double-troll.jpg" width="191" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">HAHA!</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zr59f3WcLsg/Tput8XG0RmI/AAAAAAAABEs/OoBUXeeK29c/s1600/PsMhz.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="86" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zr59f3WcLsg/Tput8XG0RmI/AAAAAAAABEs/OoBUXeeK29c/s320/PsMhz.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-j3cQRJJp1TY/Tput9jpU70I/AAAAAAAABE0/6ZjB1Md2QHw/s1600/Ac9D4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-j3cQRJJp1TY/Tput9jpU70I/AAAAAAAABE0/6ZjB1Md2QHw/s320/Ac9D4.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">2nd picture that made me wanna burst out luaghing like a retard at work...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wINobeowHBg/TpuuBFIHy3I/AAAAAAAABE8/1cNhm9NC7jE/s1600/bacon.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="280" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wINobeowHBg/TpuuBFIHy3I/AAAAAAAABE8/1cNhm9NC7jE/s320/bacon.bmp" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">ME TOO!!!</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZUo9wvILCUs/TpuuBrDX63I/AAAAAAAABFE/c-dzRTe0sOg/s1600/zaRQL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZUo9wvILCUs/TpuuBrDX63I/AAAAAAAABFE/c-dzRTe0sOg/s320/zaRQL.jpg" width="191" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GuPJENFBiSQ/TpuuCXlqLvI/AAAAAAAABFM/Ju7aUVOdOK0/s1600/GS6bl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GuPJENFBiSQ/TpuuCXlqLvI/AAAAAAAABFM/Ju7aUVOdOK0/s320/GS6bl.jpg" width="279" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-e4-ED9bMDDo/TpuuDYYdo5I/AAAAAAAABFU/ZLSaJloOop4/s1600/GS6bl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-e4-ED9bMDDo/TpuuDYYdo5I/AAAAAAAABFU/ZLSaJloOop4/s320/GS6bl.jpg" width="279" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uncnd4rWpR0/TpuuEh2iIeI/AAAAAAAABFc/RWg37IuNi-4/s1600/epic-fail-photos-things-that-are-doing-it-caught-white-handed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uncnd4rWpR0/TpuuEh2iIeI/AAAAAAAABFc/RWg37IuNi-4/s320/epic-fail-photos-things-that-are-doing-it-caught-white-handed.jpg" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yWE7J1F6wpU/TpuuE1ntsAI/AAAAAAAABFk/lnFYp1CBeeg/s1600/81pkF.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yWE7J1F6wpU/TpuuE1ntsAI/AAAAAAAABFk/lnFYp1CBeeg/s320/81pkF.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-N1PZVM-yj3Y/TpuuGKbXULI/AAAAAAAABFs/R64V4u1qd2M/s1600/KOdDb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="298" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-N1PZVM-yj3Y/TpuuGKbXULI/AAAAAAAABFs/R64V4u1qd2M/s320/KOdDb.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">HAHAHA! TOY YODA....</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-I_JLjKVTNNM/TpuuH0zJb4I/AAAAAAAABFw/snRwKLzRlOc/s1600/0lxu4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-I_JLjKVTNNM/TpuuH0zJb4I/AAAAAAAABFw/snRwKLzRlOc/s320/0lxu4.jpg" width="231" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">LIKE A BOSS... AWESOME!!</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IU5Cf25sYjg/TpuuIgZRHcI/AAAAAAAABF4/KXYGUXsRb2c/s1600/chive-on-thursday-35.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IU5Cf25sYjg/TpuuIgZRHcI/AAAAAAAABF4/KXYGUXsRb2c/s320/chive-on-thursday-35.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Gsl4Uu1EC88/TpuuJzaF4MI/AAAAAAAABGE/zxDAmHXZCE8/s1600/62rMI.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Gsl4Uu1EC88/TpuuJzaF4MI/AAAAAAAABGE/zxDAmHXZCE8/s320/62rMI.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">YEAH FUCK YOU...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MXX0c5w4xyw/TpuuLJ1fKBI/AAAAAAAABGM/-5J5oEoK58k/s1600/gLaUE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MXX0c5w4xyw/TpuuLJ1fKBI/AAAAAAAABGM/-5J5oEoK58k/s320/gLaUE.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OuBeqMmoegY/TpuuLbT-wjI/AAAAAAAABGU/ttvbZop8Wns/s1600/inspirational-quotes-271.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OuBeqMmoegY/TpuuLbT-wjI/AAAAAAAABGU/ttvbZop8Wns/s320/inspirational-quotes-271.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-SYRSkyyQYrY/TpuuMGfCsXI/AAAAAAAABGc/PLwt07MuQdk/s1600/HhPMS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-SYRSkyyQYrY/TpuuMGfCsXI/AAAAAAAABGc/PLwt07MuQdk/s1600/HhPMS.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">True.. True...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-pxfaJ7-k07U/TpuuM_GXpdI/AAAAAAAABGk/jM2_vMtIteY/s1600/IKbqZ.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-pxfaJ7-k07U/TpuuM_GXpdI/AAAAAAAABGk/jM2_vMtIteY/s320/IKbqZ.jpg" width="208" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Haha... What a line...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WfTukJfdFZI/TpuuN07EYcI/AAAAAAAABGs/Z5tVL874wEY/s1600/8FhI8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WfTukJfdFZI/TpuuN07EYcI/AAAAAAAABGs/Z5tVL874wEY/s320/8FhI8.jpg" width="111" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Zb2ltM4UVhc/TpuuOQk_wMI/AAAAAAAABG0/edDhRaG2_7o/s1600/5dwvY.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="204" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Zb2ltM4UVhc/TpuuOQk_wMI/AAAAAAAABG0/edDhRaG2_7o/s320/5dwvY.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Epic...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wa-zPuFgSo8/TpuuPVnljnI/AAAAAAAABG8/JldwA3b0gLE/s1600/TcOiS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="171" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wa-zPuFgSo8/TpuuPVnljnI/AAAAAAAABG8/JldwA3b0gLE/s320/TcOiS.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I DON'T BELIEVE!!! He put make up on his hands too???</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IitkL_2U9Lc/TpuuP_L-rMI/AAAAAAAABHE/lCQeoYHS8hM/s1600/mVHV7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IitkL_2U9Lc/TpuuP_L-rMI/AAAAAAAABHE/lCQeoYHS8hM/s320/mVHV7.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vVPNgeb1WMY/TpuuQbQGksI/AAAAAAAABHM/hKM9W3ZblMc/s1600/M5vfJ.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="118" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-vVPNgeb1WMY/TpuuQbQGksI/AAAAAAAABHM/hKM9W3ZblMc/s320/M5vfJ.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-JGlVBLFN27A/TpuuRGXf1oI/AAAAAAAABHU/meb1y6ihIgY/s1600/EZCnI.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-JGlVBLFN27A/TpuuRGXf1oI/AAAAAAAABHU/meb1y6ihIgY/s320/EZCnI.jpg" width="255" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-oglr2zJr2IE/TpuuRq_CPwI/AAAAAAAABHc/mFLyNWkgX9I/s1600/6LtRV.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-oglr2zJr2IE/TpuuRq_CPwI/AAAAAAAABHc/mFLyNWkgX9I/s320/6LtRV.png" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">That's how I feel so many times a year...</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-j_44WzTCF1g/TpuuSpKMArI/AAAAAAAABHk/BIw9DnTaB0M/s1600/fdMtf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-j_44WzTCF1g/TpuuSpKMArI/AAAAAAAABHk/BIw9DnTaB0M/s320/fdMtf.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I should... :(</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-aha1VqdpxJw/TpuuTX__tCI/AAAAAAAABHs/ZnEaOsezACM/s1600/PvwN8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="293" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-aha1VqdpxJw/TpuuTX__tCI/AAAAAAAABHs/ZnEaOsezACM/s320/PvwN8.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-04sJVV1GI_s/TpuuVTYy78I/AAAAAAAABH0/w_OjmU2J4T0/s1600/Ez5Cs.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="203" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-04sJVV1GI_s/TpuuVTYy78I/AAAAAAAABH0/w_OjmU2J4T0/s320/Ez5Cs.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MFBMCrbFepQ/TpuuYCKUrxI/AAAAAAAABH8/8R9WDGCCeW4/s1600/5b2da.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MFBMCrbFepQ/TpuuYCKUrxI/AAAAAAAABH8/8R9WDGCCeW4/s320/5b2da.png" width="219" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VnzXOVjzZWk/TpuuYiFUlCI/AAAAAAAABIE/rdRHyuLI_0c/s1600/Noj7r.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="314" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VnzXOVjzZWk/TpuuYiFUlCI/AAAAAAAABIE/rdRHyuLI_0c/s320/Noj7r.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This one is just fucking AWESOME!</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_jGHvDk_FV8/TpuuZbjXyyI/AAAAAAAABIM/_uHL2out0fs/s1600/vYVAT.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" oda="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_jGHvDk_FV8/TpuuZbjXyyI/AAAAAAAABIM/_uHL2out0fs/s320/vYVAT.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KVgIphi9Sos/TpuuaDCZH9I/AAAAAAAABIU/m4HKEAEXXvo/s1600/vYVAT.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KVgIphi9Sos/TpuuaDCZH9I/AAAAAAAABIU/m4HKEAEXXvo/s320/vYVAT.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jquNw4VEXEk/Tpuuax8gNcI/AAAAAAAABIc/b1LQg5CsuSE/s1600/rmQmH.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="153" oda="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jquNw4VEXEk/Tpuuax8gNcI/AAAAAAAABIc/b1LQg5CsuSE/s320/rmQmH.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-b4oZh2rdYyg/TpuubQ9t7MI/AAAAAAAABIk/km-d4bUOBvE/s1600/JmDmM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-b4oZh2rdYyg/TpuubQ9t7MI/AAAAAAAABIk/km-d4bUOBvE/s320/JmDmM.jpg" width="310" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Wkt5depjcWI/Tpuub-7es0I/AAAAAAAABIs/SLCZiraFzyk/s1600/lH3f0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="89" oda="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Wkt5depjcWI/Tpuub-7es0I/AAAAAAAABIs/SLCZiraFzyk/s320/lH3f0.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-H_El66K5FEc/Tpuucc-_d7I/AAAAAAAABI0/BC_LI_Z3IlA/s1600/pnMmm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" oda="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-H_El66K5FEc/Tpuucc-_d7I/AAAAAAAABI0/BC_LI_Z3IlA/s320/pnMmm.jpg" width="229" /></a></div><br /><br />These pictures made my day.. Unlike every other thing/body in my life... <br />I wish&nbsp;I was home with Bryan today... Sometimes Bryan is the only Angel that makes it all worthwhile.. :(<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6861333072502101286?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-10273242970314079372011-10-16T03:34:00.000+08:002011-10-16T03:34:04.128+08:00I was just wondering... You know those guys that see a nice pretty lady and start saying pick up lines to get her attention? Especially for those guys that are working in the servie line and they try to use those lines on you while you buying something from them? Lol... What if u do it to them first? Like, ur buying coffee from starbucks, then u see the guy, u think he's cute... So u walk up, buy a caramel frappe and say you want more caramel.. And when he ask u if thats enuf caramel, you say ''well no... Cos no amount of caramel can taste as sweet as you...'' or just go '' hi handsome.. Could you get me a HUGE caramel frappe?'' and when he says you mean a Grande size? And you say '' whatever you make, I'll take it...'' and wink... I mean, how would that guy feel? Lol... Sometimes, its really weird when you're just buying dinner from a Zhap Chai Peng(Economic rice) stall... And that fella does that to you... And while giving you change he purposely does it so your hands have to touch... And... He's not my cup of tea... How now brown cow? Be a mean ass and give him the ''You're so weird look''? Or smile and walk away? Don't know man... I'm so bored at the airport now that im just randomly thinking up situatins and how I would act in them... Logennnnn.... Ask the pilot to fly faster.... :( You said 3am... I feel sleepy... And I need to drive later... Do you think toast box's coffee will perk me up? I hope so... :(<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1027324297031407937?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-80288826624505543042011-10-09T23:16:00.000+08:002011-10-09T23:16:05.306+08:00As I was just telling Nessa the other day... There are good days... And there are bad... Today? Was bad... I almost went back to the old days of self-mutilation just to get over the pain i was feeling inside... I really felt worthless... I felt like i can't get anything right and im a loser all in all... My image in everyone's eye is not perfect and will never be... In fact, if there's a word to describe how i think my image is to everyone it'd be ''screw up''... Somehow, someway, i manage to screw up everything in my life... Whether screw it up literally or just screw it up in my mind, i still screw it up.. Something can be so perfect and awesome one minute. And the moment i get involved, it screws up... Someone ever told me... That the reason he befriended me and felt he wanted to be close to me is because he felt like i needed help... Like i had problems and he wanted to help... And he asked me if i had any problems.... Problem is, i dunno what/where is the problem... And i dunno if anyone can help me... Recently I've gotten back into wishing i was dead... Today was the worse.. I only live for the people i think will almost die of hurt if they realized i killed myself... I wouldnt hurt if i died... I would however hurt to see the people i love hurt over my death... But that's life... I think if i believe that nobody would hurt over my death... Then thereLs nth for me to live for... But there is... My mum, my dad, Bryan, Wilson, Chay Boon, Chay Chye, Gu-ma, E-Gu-Ma, E-Ma, Danny, Harris, Isk, Aryani, Fateha, Logen, and some others who will feel sad... But those that i mentioned, i know, will be devastated by my death.. And that is the sadistic thought that comforts me when i feel all alone... That if i die, those pple will be missing part of their heart cos i wanna believe im someone they do keep in their hearts... I wish im right... I wish i'll never find out that anyone I stated above didn't actually love me. I wish I'll never feel like im such a loser and so unwanted ever again... I wish I had someone to remind me everyday, that im so special and to remind me why they love me... I wish somebody would wish to be/stay with me forever and ever... I wish someone knew about these fears and pain that i go thru.. I wish someone knows exactly how to fix me... :( i wish I didn't believe that there's no one out there for me... Or did my other half did what i have no guts to do? Is my other half in Hell... Waiting for me to be with him too? Sigh... Fuck this life really... Maybe I've been saying fuck my life so often, that god decided.. Let's grant her that lousy wish... THAT'LL show her! Haha... Fuck god... Fuxk you... Fuck me.... When is the end of the world coming?<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8028882662450554304?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-52287160811640271922011-10-02T18:33:00.001+08:002011-10-02T18:33:34.677+08:00Well, I've been thinking a lot on one particular sentence Allen always told me... ''What's yours will be yours, what's not yours will never be yours even if you fight as hell to get it...'' So i guess, he's right... And i do wanna believe in that phrase.. It's just my whole life, i was raised to believe that you gotta fight for what you want... That if you want something, go get it... Doesnt matter if its difficult or if it's almost impossible... Just try! So how? How can i suddenly learn to accept that whats yours will be yours eventually...?? Im trying... Real hard to just let things be... Don't have to think so much... Act as if you know ''God has a plan'' for me... Fuck this is so difficult... :( I need to learn to accept that not all things i want will end up mine... :(<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-5228716081164027192?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-80719310304431149122011-10-02T14:56:00.000+08:002011-10-02T14:56:04.456+08:00I think it's either I'm in a good mood today.. <b>OR</b>... I finally gotten over the fact that Allen has a new girlfriend... Went to see his Facebook profile today.. And&nbsp;realized&nbsp;I'm happy he is so happy with the new girl.. Okay.. Not new like NEW... I think they've been dating a few months now... But yeah.. She seems like a nice girl... And he deserved that... I think ah... I've gotten over loving him... A lot of people think I haven't gotten over him. But it's not that... I haven't gotten over the things we went through and the experiences I shared with him... But I no longer love him... Or maybe just not the way that I would want him by my side anymore...<br /><br />-----------------------------------------------------------<br /><br />So, I haven't been blogging a long time... Not that I don't have the time.. I just didn't feel like it...<br /><br />I went to Phuket recently with Logen and only one phrase to say it all... Cheers to screw ups! Haha...<br /><br />First, at the airport JUST before boarding the plane, I realized I forgot to bring my underwater camera. I was super excited about bringing it and using it to capture awesome moments and to have so much fun with it... It literally felt like I forgot to bring my baby with me... :( I almost cried... It was a devastating time and it took me several hours to get over that feeling of being stupid...<br /><br />Second, We didn't really intended the area we stayed in to be... Well, like how it is... It was an experience... But we would prefer a different experience the next time so we decided maybe we wouldn't go back and stay there.. Visit the places there, maybe.. But not stay right in the&nbsp;center&nbsp;of it all.. :)<br /><br />Thirdly, we overspent... Even though we didn't spend money like we were in a Monopoly game... And, accounting the fact that we didn't even shop much... We still over spent... Phuket is definitely much more expensive than Hatyai... Tourism did it's job well...<br /><br />Lastly, and the most awesome screw up we did? We missed our flight back from Phuket... We reached the Airport just as the plane was taking off... Like what you see in the movies? Yes, we literally ran for the plane like retards, hoping in all hell the whole fucking plane would wait for us... I guess time waits for no man... HAHA! So when we realized we were <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">THAT</span> screwed.. It was time for a wake up call... To our parents... HAHA! Naturally, Logen's mum freaked... My mum was calmer... And we fixed the whole situation gradually... I wouldnt have mind staying for a whole month in Phuket though... I think deep down, secretly, we both wished the next earliest flight was a month later... LOL!<br /><br />So we figured... No point sulking over spilled milk.. Why not just make the most out of this first time experience... As we were taking a puff outside the airport figuring out what to do until our next flight...I jokingly asked Logen if it was a good idea to hitch a drive from some random tourist... Logen, as usual, didnt take me seriously and thought me<i> CA-RAY-ZEE</i>... But inside? I was really contemplating the idea of hitch hiking from the airport...<br /><br />You see... The place where all the good pubs is were about 45mins drive away from the airport.. And we didn't wanna stay all night at the airport.. It'll be such a sucky way to spent the last night at Phuket.. So as we were smoking... I saw 2 random tourists, looking lost.. And i just told Logen I'm going for it.. And I enforced on my idea... Spoke to them, asked them where they're heading and GUESS WHAT??? SAME AREA!!!! They were waiting/looking for their hotel's cab and they couldn't find it.. And they had no Thailand number so we helped them.. And voila~! We made new friends from Queensland... Sean &amp; Natasha... Beautiful couple, I must say... Natasha's an angel.. They're both sooo nice... Had a nice conversation in the cab...<br /><br />So, we headed back to the pubs area... And drank til the morning rose.. Wonderful time... Good time... REALLY good time.. I think the best night out of all the nights we spent there was the night we shouldn't have been there... After hours of drinking, we headed to karaoke a bit.. And then we went for a stroll on the beach... <b>It was nothing less than AWESOME..</b>. It was an experience I'll never forget...<br /><br />And between you and me? I'm glad I screwed up... Haha.. Minus the fact I have to pay $120 extra for the new flight tickets.. But it was definitely worth it... And that is why.. Logen and I plan to go to Thailand again next year... Budgeting is more or less settled... And we will be going during Songkran, so we can fully experience the wonderful culture of their Water Splashing Festival or I think it's kinda like their New Years...<br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>I LOVE THAILAND !!!</b></span><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: xx-small;">And I'm gonna learn to speak THAI! :D</span><br />--------------------------------------------------------------<br /><br />Been missing my Veegees for the longest time.. And I feel bad that I haven't really been making the effort to meet up with them.. I swear.. Soon... :)<br /><br />Wells... Update again soon.. :)<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8071931030443114912?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-82971266558518925412011-07-10T06:36:00.001+08:002011-07-10T06:36:18.109+08:00just home from celebration of yeni's bday.. Was fun... Turned out well although started kinda bad.. Good night out... :) gonna celebrate bryans bday later.. And i dunno if i shud slp. Slping for a few hrs and waking up agn will ruin my mood. Havent even buy anything for fatboy yet... Dunno what to buy.. He say he wants a skateboard. Shud i? I have a feeliing he wun play with it for long. How much is a cheap skateboard?? Hmmmm...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8297126655851892541?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-61104458877561226202011-07-08T06:23:00.001+08:002011-07-08T06:23:48.924+08:00blogging with my phone cos im so bored on the way to work.. Sianzzzzz.... So its been awhile since i blogged... Whazzzzzzaaaaap.... Works been a whore.. But its alright cos my social/leisure life has been pretty good too... Sentosa with 3 beautiful babes and one macho man. That got me a fucked up heat stroke that lasted thru the night. But it was all good fun... Drinking with the guys... And mostly, spending quality time with my dad at malacca and genting.. Im so glad i did that even though we lost lots of money... But its like a little getaway with my dad... All worth it.. Money can earn back.. But moment and quality memories built with my father cant be erased. Unless both of us end up with weird old disease that makes us forgets things. But... Thats like long time later.. Awesome.. Im gonna sleep in the train... Toodle lee doo guys...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6110445887756122620?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-12367369546458771972011-05-22T12:04:00.001+08:002011-05-22T12:20:46.434+08:00Just need a place to do a qucik chat with myself... lol.. to note down this wierd moment thaqt im feeling so many emotions.. lol... <br /><br />So anyways, Nobody reads this blog... so fuck it... im just gonna use real names and say out everything cos im sick of hiding these feelings...<br /><br />Danny is back from Thailand. And im sad and happy and excited and feeling weird too.<br />Sad that when he was away he didnt really msg me much. Not that i expected him to. But it would have been nice. And happy that he's back safe and sound. And excited to be able to see him again. Weird cos suddenly today i woke up and saw his msg i felt like i really NEED to tell him how i feel for him. <br /><br />But when i switched on the television, i found myself telling myself to not be stupid. And all the past conversations i had with everyone about me liking him start to rush back to me. ANd my heart and my brain declared war... I wanna tell him so badly i like him. I like him very very much and although for the past few years lotsa stuff happened in between to us individually. I liked him since the day i knew he existed. I just never knew how much it grew since we started hanging out.<br /><br />And everytime i see him i get happy and i get neervous. Happy that "OMG IT'S DANNY!!!"... Nervous that i won't be able to hold it in any longer annd ill just tell him that i really really like him. Dont get me wrong guys. I like him. I like his personality and i like the way he looks and the way he acts and most of the time, the way he treats me. Doesnt mean i want a relationship out of him. So many times i figured that it's just wishful thinking on my part. And after i read the book " The Secret" ... I tried to tell myself it's reachable. It's possible. Danny can totally like me back... Cos they say if you think it, it happens. But you must act it... The later part of the book states you must act like it has already happened. That Danny already likes me..<br /><br />But then, i guess im not a Master of The Secret yet. Cos everytime i thought that he knows i like him and that for a little bit, he feels like he can like me too? I realise, it IS wishful thinking. He treats me like how he treats all his friends. He just doesnt have much close friends who are girls. He treats everyone he cares for with the same attitude. And he doesnt like me. Not at all.. He just treats me as a friend. nothing more and nothing less.<br /><br />And the more i think about it the more respect i have for him because if he can be so nice to me even if he doesnt like me. Imagine how nice he would be if he liked me? Could it be im thinking waaaaay too much into things? Dun wonder. It's true. Everytime i think about it. I end up with the same conclusion... DON'T DO IT MANDY!!! Don't ruin the fucking status quo... Don't fucking try and try to hard just to fall... <br /><br />So anyway, yes. I like Danny... I like Danny!!! I really really like Danny!!! And every body fucking knows!!! EXCEPT HIM!!! Everyone gets it!!! Except him!!! Maybe he knows. There's a possiblity he knows. But point is, he didnt figure it out by me telling him. And i didnt get to see the reaction about him figuring out that i like him. That he knows FOR SURE that i like him. And i always wonder how the conversation will go if one day i really do decide to fuck all, and tell him how i feel...<br /><br /><em>Me: "Danny, i have lotsa stuff to tell you. Firstly, i like you. I really REALLY like you. I liked you for a long time and i didnt dare to tell you straight cos i was afraid it would affect our friendship and it would screw up more than just OUR friendship. It'll screw up the whole flow of the whole group of friends. Im telling you this not expecting you to reciprocate this feelings. Nor is it to dig a relationship out of you. There are only 2 reasons why im telling you. Cos i really really like you and its hard to keep it in. I know its for selfish reasons but if i dun tell you, ill suffer... Ill suffer not knowing how exactly you feel for me... 2ndly, i need it to end. This feeling of always wondering whether there is possibility.&nbsp; The undying stupid hope of mine. I keep trying to stop this feeling but i can't. So im hoping maybe you can. You can help me to either try harder, and hopefully successfuly, to stop liking you. Or you can help me to like you even more. Either way it goes, i need help with this and i can tell the whole world how much i like you but none of them can help with these feelings. Except you. I really really like you. But more than liking you, i really really hope that however this conversation turns out to be. That it wont affect the awesome friendship that we have built thru the years. And i hope that you guys wun kick me out of the group for being such a stupid full of emotions fucked up woman. Cos i know on my side that no matter how this turns out, i treat you and the the guys as my very treasured friends. And if this stupid move of mine ruins it. I may feel so much better about my feelings for you, cos it has a complete closure already. But ill never forgive myself for losing my friendship with you guys just for my selfish reasons. I dun ask you to like me back or to explain why, if you dont like me, why have you been so uber nice to me.. I just need to know.. Should i like you more? Or should i stop?"</em><br /><br /><em>Danny: " What? *stares right back at me* Why you tell me?"</em><br /><br /><em>Me: " Dont tell you tell who?"</em><br /><br /><em>Danny: " I dunno.. stop?" </em><br /><br /><em>Me: "well, oh fuck.. yup thanks for listening. Lets go for a drink.. "</em><br /><br /><br />Thats roughly how i figure itll turn out.. But i havent got the guts to pull it off yet... No matter how many times i practise this speech in my mind.. Everytime i have the chance to do it. I chicken out. Or i find it so stupid i knock the senses out of me and start to act all hyper so it'll cover up what i really wanna do. Or ill just act sad and pissed. Cos then at least its not longing or loving ness thats coming out of me... Lol.. Im saying as if i can control my feeling so well. In actual fact. I can't... I don't act all pissed and sad or hyper.. It happens as it is, cos i just let wtv else feelinsg take control. <br /><br />So anyway, apart from the whole Danny thing. <br /><br />I need a Thai Girlfriend or Boyfriend. Eh wait, oh fuck.. No no no.. I don't want Thai Girlfriend... Cos wait.. WHY? ALLEN HAS A FUCKING THAI GIRLFRIEND!!! LOLOLOL!!! Fucking hilarious. It's like everything around me has been circling around thai stuff nowadays. Every since i went to Hatyai. more of my friends start to go to thai disco. or maybe its just cos i choose to go out with those friends who hangs out at TD. I start to meet more people that in love with thai girls and boys. I start to see more thai people around me. People start telling me they're planning for a trip to thailand. My ex boyf ends up with a thai girls that he barely knows but loves. Found out that some of my ex colleagues are dating thai people now. Realise when i went to a thai disco that there ARE HOTT thai guys in Singapore. <br /><br />So thailand? You're taking over my world... But fuck no... I wont let it take all of me... <br /><br />Aite.. Picnic day with Fat, Yeni and Murni. I think maybe Azim also? But anyway... PICNIC DAY!!! WOOOHOOO! I WOKE UP EARLY TODAY!!!! HI HI HO HO.. GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE!!!! <br /><br />Kay bye.<br /><br />Oh wait... I promised Afiqa ill blog about the day the guys sang for me for my bday. <br /><br /><br />K. The guys planned. They planned from the start of the month of March that they will not all be around whenever we plan to meet. Someone has to not meet . Cos if the do, ill make them all sing me a song. Th erule is that everyone has to be there then can sing. If not no song. So i kept trying to make everyone meet up and make everyone sing to me cos they promised!!! Danny and Isk promised. Thinking i would forget. I i didnt.. I made TK and Harris promise too. EVen though they didnt really promise. TK just said if Danny sing then he'll sing. And since Danny promised. They all HAD TO sing.. LOL.<br /><br />So one night after my bday. Somehow we all met up. ANd they didnt raise up this issue cos they were all praying i forgot. I also didnt raise the topic cos i was hoping they would. But they didnt. So i REMINDED them.. <br /><br />Reaction? <br /><br />TK: "WAAAAH!!! WE THOUGHT YOU FORGET LIAO SIAA!!! FUCK MAN!!!! DANNY!!! ALL YOUR FAULT LAAAAA!!! WHY YOU PROMISE HERRRR?"<br /><br />HARRIS: " FUCK NOOOOO!!!!"<br /><br />DANNY:" SHIT! WHYYYYYYY?"<br /><br />ISK:" *smiles*"<br /><br />So we went to eat and Bukit Timah. And i kept trying to make them sing to me there. In public. Where people can see. LOL. OBVIOUSLY!!! They refused. I could have killed them, and they STILL wouldnt'...<br /><br />So they decided to go to a more ulu place... SOme park. shit i forgot whats the park name. But it's near the PSA place... Dammit... I think its Kent Ridge Park.. So, went up there... Lepak for awhile.. And i was getting nervous. They coudl see it in my face... And they tot i was pissed cos no one of them dared to start singing first. So we joked around. And Harris really saw that i was being uncomfortable. In fact, i was having butterflies in my tummy cos no boyd every sang me a full song before. And imagine all of them, the guys that i love so much all singing to me? Heaven couldnt beat that feeling.<br /><br />So i wen to the toilet cos thats what butterflies do to me. And Harris had to follow me cos i was scared and it was dark and eerie... <br /><br />After that when i came back, they were all just chit chatting until Harris got sick of it and told everyone to google the lyrics and asked me to play the song. And they all sang to me. It started off really awkward and funny. They didnt sound very enthusiastic about it but nonetheless, an effort. For them, all big macho men to sing for me, i could ask for nothing more. But!!! I did... I told them :" MUST SING PROPERLY LAH!! WITH FEELINGS!!!" So they sang louder. Not with feelings.. But just louder...<br /><br />Then Harris started to be really nice and faced me and sing. Like literally serenading me. And that was when i felt truly touched by the gesture. And Isk smiles at me. And winked cos he know how happy i was. Tk just laughed and ask me not to cry, or i think he thought i was crying. And Danny didnt look at me much but he sang. And he added things like "nooo" after lyrics "her lips her lips" or "her eyes her eyes" ... Which kind hurt me a little cos it was suppose to be a song for me. I dun care if the lyrics dun fit me. I just wanted all of them to sing me a song. And the only lyrics i cared for was.. "You're amazing, just the way you are"<br /><br />So, they all sang, the full song.. With mme close to tears and dunno whether to smile or laugh or cry. They sang well. and i could sense they are awkward but they did it for me. They pulled thru. They didnt care that a few passer by(s) could hear them. They didnt care that they dont even sing to any other people or that they dun even sing in the showers. They sang. And they sang the song i chose. And even if they say nooooo after certain lyrics. I felt truly amazing. Like i felt like i was really amazing to them. And that feeling lasted thru the whole song. And a few minutes after that. :) SO that moment? I'll never forget... <br /><br />Truth be told? It was kinda awkward for me too. To see all of them sing. LOL... But it was great... You know what so good about having a bunch of macho men as your friends? They always make you expect less.. Then when they do certain things.. you become more surprised and more appreciative. Cos you never knew they were capable of such stuffs. And what touched me most. They didnt make an empty promise... They pulled thru... Thats why i love them... <br /><br />And thats why its so hard for me... To risk telling Danny.. and screw it all up. It's the things they do for me. And the things i wanna do for them... That makes me think so hard. About being selfish... <br /><br />But Fateha/Yeni once said: " if he cherishes your friendship as much as you do to his, then you telling him how you feel won't affect anything..."<br /><br />Risk it? Or not? We'll let my heart and brain figure that out themselves...<br /><br />bye guys... and AFIQA?? STAY STRONG!! 3 WEEKS WILL PASS IN A BLINK OF AN EYE!! :)<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1236736954645877197?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-47053675382403268932011-04-07T21:11:00.000+08:002011-04-07T21:11:47.519+08:00Seems a long time since i blogged. I have turned 21. I got a puppy/dog... I've gotten more or less settled with work... I made new friends.. Some relationship changed... And so much more happening with life... Some so trivial that i probably have forgotten...<br /><br />Why the FUCK is it that when i'm blogging now, i have butterflies in my stomach??? Like as if something's gonna happen...? May i just haven't been blogging for awhile and i'm excited at what i might be blogging about... Or fuck it.. Maybe i just need to shit...<br /><br />*after a good shit*<br /><br />YEEEEAP!!! I just needed to shit... Hahahahaa... K..<br /><br />So i'm just back from my Thailand trip with Logen. It was good. Got almost all of everything i went there for... Just wish i would have gone 1 week later. During their SONGKRAN festival. It would have been more than perfect... If only we'd knew earlier... We would have planned a later holiday... :( Wasted...<br /><br />So we made new friends... New Thai friends.. Very nice people.. Awesome... :) Can't wait for when it's their turn to come Singapore and we can show them around...<br /><br />Somehow i got a little home-sick this trip... Stupid i know.. Was just 5 days... But at certain times i felt super weird.. Like i miss some things here.... And like i wish some people i love were there with me...<br /><br />I think i'm slipping very slowly and steadily into a very sad mode. And i'm trying my best to stop that process and hyper up the happy genes.. but then also, i feel like i don't want to do anything... Like im so lazy to think so much about thinking too much... ha... fucked... =/<br /><br />Alright... I'll blog again when i'm free... Cos if i blog more then it'll aggravate the sadness..<br />Bye.. :)<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4705367538240326893?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-40571897280725188172011-02-08T17:37:00.000+08:002011-02-08T17:37:08.152+08:00<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/8mwEdSZZG6E" title="YouTube video player" width="400"></iframe><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Just watched P.S I Love You at home.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">First and foremost, now im lusting for some irish men...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Secondly, the song... So beautiful.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">So beautiful it makes me sad.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">So beautiful i wanna dedicate it to the man i still love even after its been awhile...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cried like a baby when i watched the show.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If you could love me like how Holly loves Gerry,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I dont mind dying young.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... What a load of shit...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I planned out so many things to blog about...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But now... All i can think of is sad thoughts and all the shit that comes along with it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">CNY wasnt fruitful at all..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just like the new year.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Brought nothing new to my life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And showed me nothing new...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just reminded me of how ill ALWAYS be looking for something..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Something in the nothing that i live in...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and that makes me a sad sad person...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Well, work starts tomorrow.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">DREADFUL... never dreaded school as much as i dread work...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Ive done many thinsg that can be classified as regretful..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But i think so far..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Nothing beats screwing up my relationship with Allen.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos it has dragged on so long and everyday i still find reasons why i still want/need to love him.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Other than those days when i was younger,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">when i quarrelled with my mum or brother and wished them to die.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think the regret and the guilt... for that...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Can share number one spot with the regret and guilt..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">that i feel for screwing up with Allen.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and no fucking thing is gonna change that...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im getting so sick and tired of seeing relationship around me turn sour..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanna tell them so bad...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">that just hold on...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Hold on hard even when times are bad...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">even if you feel like they're not good enough for you..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">hold on even if you think you're so sick of them...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Hold on because if you don't...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he/she is the one that you find out you truly love...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then you regret...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And that regret doesnt go away...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">It may hide itself from time to time as your drown yourself in trying so hard to be happy...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But then this regret will come and it will remind you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That your whole life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You didnt, and never...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">learnt how to settle...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Settle... and be contented...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because you will learn... either way...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That regret... Is a very painful process...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos regret comes along with many other pains in life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like being out of love...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like loneliness...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like heart break...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">sometimes your heart tempts you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">To do things you think its right and you wont regret it..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But when your brain kicks in after you've followed your heart?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You realised your heart was a whore...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Made you say and do so many silly thinsg to the one you love...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But then? Its too late...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... Big fucking... Sigh....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Valentine's Day is coming...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i was really successful in not thinking about it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">until Yesterday when i saw Bread talk selling heart shaped bakeries...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i walked past the florist...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i remember the last Valentines day i spent with someone special..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And then i remember the first time i spent valentines day with Allen..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We spent it at work...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And the last hour of it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We spent it arguing...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Another regret... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">You realise how silly you've been...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Only when you lose the person you were silly with...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I thought i was so right...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I thought every step and every request i had was totally reasonable..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I had excuses for everything i wanted and expected...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I had a million things to say to turn the tables around when i was wrong...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When all i should have said is "Im sorry..."</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And mean it... Not "Im sorry but...."</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But just "Im sorry and I love you... I dont want to fight".</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But instead when we fight..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I will have a million things to say and make you feel so small...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like you made the biggest and stupidest mistake anyone could make...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">God dammit...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I really thought... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">That i was right...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And that i did the right things...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That i was the mature one...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I thought i was the one pushing our relationship to gretaer heights...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos i had a vision...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That vision was about who i wanted you to be...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I forgot to appreciate who you were... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I really forgot... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">So Im sorry... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im sorry Allen...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And to those out there who thinks your relationship is somehow fucked up..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just think again and again...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he makes you happier than no one else every did before..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If you feel blessed when youre with him..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You may hate him when you quarrel...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">he may seem like a stupid insensitive jerk.. (maybe he is)</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But unless he's done criminal acts on you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he's a gentleman to you..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he's just stupid cos he cant figure us girls&nbsp;out...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he's not the romantic kind..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he doesnt do big surprises for you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he doesnt know how to make you happy when you're mad at him.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he's always saying "Im sorry" even when its not his fault.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When he tells you he doesnt wanna fight cos he loves you and he hates fighting with you.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And you think its just cos he's not bothered...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When you see him get so heartbroken after you mentioned about breaking up.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he begs you to stay and he'll change even though he doesnt...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he promise to be all you want him to be but he cant live up to that...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because your expectations of him is just too high...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When he begs you for too many second chances to let him be the best for you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When you tell him how disapointed&nbsp;you are with him..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he makes you more promises just so you'll stick with him longer..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You think its stupid how many promises he makes and breaks.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Think again...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Are those promises really something even YOU can live up to?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If he asked you to change yourself...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Parts of yourself that you have always been since you remember...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe there are stories behind the things everyone does.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe there's a reason why he smokes so much.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe there's a reason why he's so into something stupid ...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like spending hard earned money on a laptop he doesnt need?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe all those promises wont be so important..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">If you lose him...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">They're nothing... this promises?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Becomes less than nothing...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">They become you enemies...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">You may be young and all...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But when you screw up something so good?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just because you're sick and tired of the same routine?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just because you think you deserve someone better?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just because he's not who you want him to be?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You live with that regret for a long time...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and you miss out on everything else,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">when you're living down that regret...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You cant just BITE THE BULLET on this...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">The bullet bites you..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And it bites deeper into you each day...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">And nobody knows cos after awhile...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You stop calling upi friends to whine about how sad you are...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because after awhile...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You realise your pain cannot always be the centre of attention in everyone's life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You realise when you're crying os hard at night you wanna die..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That you just dun wanna let anyone hear your cries..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos its pathetic..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Its pathetic how long and hard this bullet has bitten you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and you cant fight against it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and everyone thinks you're crazy for trying so hard to be crazy fun and seem like you're enjoying life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Everyone thinks you're of no cure...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">They think you forget all your values and principles cos you're trying so hard to be happy..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sometimes even YOU yourself think you're straying way too far...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But at night when you're home or alone...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">You cry... you cry cos you dunno what the fuck you're doing...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And nobody knows what the fuck you're doing too...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">The past year or so...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I have tried..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And many times i thought i was quite successful in being okay...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But its times like now... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I realise i cant get you out of my life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">No matter how much you dont wanna see or talk to me...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I cant get you out of my life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">May be nothing to you..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Or to anyone...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">What we've been through...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But everyday...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think about it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">and this world is equipped with everythings there is...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">To remind me... EVERY FUCKING DAY...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">of what we gone through...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><em><span style="font-size: x-small;">P.S I love you...</span></em> </span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4057189728072518817?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-91160857073006357812011-01-23T18:32:00.000+08:002011-01-23T18:32:28.723+08:00<span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u><strong>Grey's Anatomy</strong></u></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>Arizona to Calliope</strong></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>"But im here now,</em></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>And im staying.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>Now,im not perfect.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>But neither are you.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>And you wanna talk about faults?</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>How about not being able to forgive?</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>At some point you're gonna have to forgive me.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>It may as well be now.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>Because i am in love with you.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>and you are in love with me.</em></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><em>All im asking for is one more chance."</em></span> </span><br /><em><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span></em><span style="color: black;">&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">--------------------------------------------------------</span></em> </span><br /><span style="color: black;">&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Sometimes i wonder maybe i gave up to early.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Maybe if i held on a little longer.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">My forgiveness would have came to me.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Maybe i backed out too early and failed to prove that i WAS committed to him.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And now, i guess its too late to even say the words "Let's start afresh"</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Dont misunderstand.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Im not saying there's no chance at all that i might get a second chance.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">But neither am i saying i may have a shot at it.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I am the constant variable.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have no say.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My heart is still just for one.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But there's just no way to show it.</span> </span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span><span style="color: black;">&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Because unlike in the shows.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I dont have the money to buy over the house just next door to his.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And i am not strong enough for as many more rejections he can give.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I just know, that if i go all out for it.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And in the case of a rejection.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I will fall... Fall soooo fucking deep...</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">So fucking deep into depression again that i might just wanna die.</span> </span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span><span style="color: black;">&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And i am afraid.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Maybe in another way selfish. And cowardly.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">But not for a second did it leave my mind.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">That i still do love him.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And i still do want him back in my life.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And for every happy and sad romantic moments i see around me.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Be it on tv, in real life, or in story books.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">My mind instinctively thinks of him.</span> </span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span><span style="color: black;">&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I am a self-proclaimed romantic at times.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">My mind thinks of such wonderful romantic things i can do to/with the person i love.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">But there is no such person that wants to receive this affection.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">I mean there is one that i love, but doesnt want this affections.</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">There are many that wants this affection,</span> </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">but not the ones that i love.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">Faaaaaarrrkkkkk...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">I typed a whole long post and turns out only this was saved. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">=( stupid internet... =(</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">fuck it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;"><strong>Bottomline: Ill save the whining about love to my pms-ing days.</strong></span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">Bottombottomline: </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">I watched "The ghost must be crazy" with the boys last night.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">T'was AWESOME!!!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">I LURRRVE IT.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">Thinking about it makes me happy-er... =D</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana;">So okays.Byes</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-9116085707300635781?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-34725159464621529482011-01-10T19:50:00.001+08:002011-01-10T20:01:35.106+08:00<span style="color: black;">YOU TAKE YOUR BROS...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">YOU SHINE IT REEEEALLLL GOOOOOD....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">AND SHOVE IT UP YOURS.....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fucking retard...</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><object height="385" width="640"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dpQsKD1agW8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dpQsKD1agW8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><br />I realise...<br />I like this song...<br />Cos... I feel this song... <br />I dunno if its the hormones talking..<br />But i miss you Allen..<br />I miss you so much and i wish things were different...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-3472515946462152948?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-42457333145678305022011-01-09T18:10:00.000+08:002011-01-09T18:10:32.658+08:00<span style="color: black;">So many things...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That make me want more happy juice.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Screw it all and drown myself with happy juice.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So yeah.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Haters come haters go.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im sick of caring for people that only give a shit about themselves.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I guess like they say you cant please everyone.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">No point trying all hard to make the person feel loved by you.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When you're not the person he needs/wants love from.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We all care about only ourselves from time to time.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I just dont get how you can keep doing the same shit to the same person that took so much&nbsp;of your bull.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Apparently all the bad things we say we wanna do?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We make sure we do it soon and do it quick.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">so that we become credible for what we say.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But the good things we say we will do?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Suddenly fades far away when we're all down on ourselves.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I get it you know.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When we're all down and out we want people to make us feel better.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We wish they knew exactly what to say and do to make us feel better.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But shit doesnt go our way all the time and sometimes we bite the bullet.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos we know of the intentions behind the wrong things people say.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Some people take things the wrong way.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And sometimes we cant do anything about it.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">But when you push it far and act all like i did&nbsp; something so wrong.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When i was just trying to joke around.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Who would fucking know you're being all down and under at that moment i made that joke?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Before that day when i made that joke initially everything was fine and dandy.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Until you decided to pick me as your scapegoat.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Someone to just throw your shit at.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">normally? I would gladly take it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos im proud to say that i love you and i treat you as someone important in my life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But one shit too many.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I call quits.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I give up.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Call me stupid call me lame call me weak call me bitchy.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Call me whatever you want.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I cant pretend it doesnt hurt everytime you act like you're all that matters.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im human too and i have feelings too.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And if you ever cared enough to ask.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I have problems too.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So here's it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Here's another fucking goodbye that maybe you'll fucking hate or love.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Who knows... I dunno what or who i mean to you anymore...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">you're not the only one that knows and can feel emotions.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Well, lets drop it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos its over.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Another friendship loss.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Should be used to it by now..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno why i always dwell myself into these sorrows.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Friendship never last.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I get toooo attached to friends i think will stay with me til i grow old.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And become successful and even when i have my own family.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I start to think that nth can shake that friendship.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then? =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;">BAM! Cant deny the fact.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">True friends? BULLSHIT.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We beleive in true friends when we feel like there's no othe rpeople to believe in.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But when there's some other people that makes you feel better than your true friend makes you feel?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We immediately go for the next best thing...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Ok. Shit i said ill drop it .</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So drop it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Aite... Work still sucks as bad...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Hoping i can get to transfer to the sales department soon.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Get a small car.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Work hard for money.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno whats my next road.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">All i can think about now is how i can get some alcohol in my system.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And my scope consultation is tomorrow.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which will suck cos i drank last night.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And my gastric is growling today.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And im planning to drink somemore tonight.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So screw whatever consultation.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe the worser my condition is the better ill feel.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">dont feel super helathy today.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Not physically. Not emotionally.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanna go back to Hatyai. :(</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanna find comfort in the stupid little things that wont matter in my life in years to come.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im sick of spending time mending things i hope will be mended soon because i want those things in my future.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">think i need to evaluate some priorities in my life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">think i got them all jumbled up again.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i think my number of friends that i still can count on?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Have gone down to a number i can count with&nbsp;less than half the&nbsp;fingers on my hands.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Argh.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">fuck it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So anyway.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Highlighted my hair blond.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Think it looks kinda cool.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I like it at times... ;)</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Wanted it to be white higlights but they bleached my hair 2 tims and thats the best they could get. blond.. =/</span><br /><span style="color: black;">guess no matter how hard i try ill only get to be a dumb blond.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">unless i go brunette.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">LOL. i wanted my head to look like a skunk/zebra crossing after my highlights.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But nah.. we dont get all the shits we want in life.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But somehow? We learn to GET OVER IT.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So cheers to getting over it.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4245733314567830502?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-60219538798117413052010-12-24T13:10:00.000+08:002010-12-24T13:10:13.323+08:00<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I was doing good...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I was happy and all hyped up for Christmas last night.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I was all crazy about christmas.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Thne today happened.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Work happened.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And sucked out all the happy in me.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">WHAT in the HELL is a festive season?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">When everyone else gets half day off and you get a QUARTER day off.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">What's the fucking difference?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I stay in TPY. I work in Jurong. =(</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">By the time i reach home everyone's snuggling up to their loved ones saying </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;"><span style="color: #274e13; font-size: large;"><strong>MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS.&nbsp;&nbsp; =D</strong></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I hate this.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna leave everything and leave... =(</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Sucks... But yeah. Im trying hard to be happy.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">HARD!! Like real HARD!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Cos im gonna try to be a great host to tomorrows party.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And this requires some planning. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And this requires spirit and motivation.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Which i feel the minute spent in the office i sucking everything out. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">DAMMIT!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Hatyai is still not out of my mind...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And I still cant get over how awesome spending time away from Singapore is...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna fly away.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna be a bird.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna be a fucking bird that migrates all the time.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">To better greens when winter comes.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;"><strong>I wanna FLYYYYYY..... </strong></span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Fuck work. 3PM knock off...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">SUCKS!!!</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6021953879811741305?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-20900369033292346192010-12-21T08:08:00.000+08:002010-12-21T08:08:18.133+08:00<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I need to get this poison out of me...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">This poison that getting me addicted to the fun i had in Hatyai.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I need to stop thinking about Hatyai.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I cant eat with out thinking about Hatyai.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I cant sleep without thinking about Hatyai. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I cant work without wishing i was in Hatyai.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I've been poisoned by Hatyai. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I just feel like taking the next flight back there and stay there.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">For as long as i want to.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">This sucks.. I dont wanna talk about it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Cos talking about it makes me miss it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Missing it makes me feel foolish.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Feeling foolish makes me sad.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">So anyway. What Sam said is true.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">You might not forget them.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">But they'll forget you.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">So you know what?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Im gonna try hard to forget them.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Like as if Hatyai was just another trip.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Im awesome. I can do better. =)</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Right? </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">So apart from that...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Life's been boring.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Planned a christmas party at home this weekend. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">But somehow i have this feeling its not gonna be how i wish it was.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">So im lowering my expectations.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Im just happy if i can have all my family together and just chill out at home.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Talk cock sing song play mahjong... =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Well today im determined to get&nbsp; Hatyai out of my head.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And to live my Singapore life.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">My lousy lonely stupid fucked up singapore life.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Hmmm, i realise.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">This feelings i have.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Have a very big possibility that it is exaggerated because!!!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Because i dont have someone special. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Someone here that keeps me grounded and makes every other country with/without him seems unimportant.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I want a boyfriend. Why boyfriend? I think i dont really like girls anymore.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Thanks to the office environment where i am surrounded by women everywhere.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I realise. There's not much to them.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Just.. Nice to look at...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">think my sexuality is changing..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Lol. Maybe temporarily. Maybe forever.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">But who knows.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Who cares.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I need to find a boyfriend now... LIKE NOW~~</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">And i dont wanna do it via facebook and stuff cos its lame.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">To get to know people from facebook and&nbsp;media stuff.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">SUCKsssss... Work starts... =(</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I hate this.. I dont like where i am now..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Other than the part that i might leave my family,</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I&nbsp;wish i was somewhere else...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna migrate..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Fly far away...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Become a totally new person..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Im sick of feeling fucked up in Singapore...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">I wanna be fucked up somewhere else.. =(</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-2090036903329234619?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-41342490489929743152010-11-30T14:05:00.001+08:002010-11-30T14:56:02.251+08:00<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lJNHDPMFdi0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lJNHDPMFdi0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Something i think fits very well for Keong's situation.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Dunno?? </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>AND...!! One of MY Wedding song is going to be...!!</strong></span><br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HGJhOAgC2zs?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HGJhOAgC2zs?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">ANYWAYS.....</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">I realise a very common phenomenon. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">When we are at the twenties and mid-twenties,</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="color: black;">we look back on ourselves</span> in our teenage years and we laugh.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">SO FUCKING UGLY THEN!!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When we're in our thirties,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">we look back on when we were 20 and go,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">"WOW, prime time... I was rockin' it baby"...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then when we're 40, that i dunno... I havent reached that realization yet...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But fuck! </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I just saw a OLD picture of me when i was in sec 2 i think.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i looked UGLY!! Fucking fat and UGLY!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Not that there's much improvements now.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But i think its safe to say that i look better now than i did 5 years ago.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe its the way i dress or the way i portray myself.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But when i think about it,</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think i had more confidence then, than i did now.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">When i was 15, i didnt care what i could have and what i couldnt have.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I just went for it.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I knew i like somebody, and even if i know its impossible cos im totally not their type.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I totally go for it and do the silliest stupidest thing a school girl can do.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Confess her feelings to boys that she KNEW dont like her back.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">NOW? Sigh....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">They say fear comes with age...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Wariness come with experiences...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno what else they say..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But the point is that, </span><br /><span style="color: black;">as we grow older...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We lose courage...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We lose the balls to do things we would have done with a&nbsp;blink of an eye </span><br /><span style="color: black;">when we were younger.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Now when i want to do something, or when i feel something.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think, and i hesitate.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">WHY?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">For the fear.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear of rejection, fear of being broken again.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear of losing something again...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear of me myself being the reason that i lose something important.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear of screwing up and bringing others down with me.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear of being judged that im 20 and still unable to think properly.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fear that ill end up being a dissapointment to those i love.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">THESE FEARS...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Elevates with age....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Because we feeeeeeed this monstrous fears...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">We give them what they need.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">We give them life.... =( </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Something we cant just run away from....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I think i have a fear of life...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And everything that comes along with it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe not the serious kind of phobia...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But i think i have a kind of fear that even i dun noe about...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Everyday i live my life thinking whats in store next?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">What's life gonna do to me next?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Steal away some other life that i care about?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Take away someone i care so much about?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Screw me up and then leave me to struggle?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Watch me feel my insides burn up and slowly fade away?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Watch me give up and laugh at my face?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Life is my the devil to me... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Life isnt god's gift....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Life is what the devil gave us...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">To watch us suffer...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">There's always 2 ways to look at things...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sometimes 3... <em>if you know what i mean..</em> </span><br /><span style="color: black;">BUT! Point is, i dont think life is a gift.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I really dun think so...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Although i always associate new born babies and cute little toddlers with the word "god's gift"..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Its just a matter of speech... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">They're beautiful...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im not denyin the fact that there's lotsa beautiful stuff in this world..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im just saying... The devil like sto get you side tracked...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just when you thank god for the things that goes well for you...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">HE screws you up... and laughs in your face for thinking this is all god's work...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">LOL...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I can totally make a sadistic move out of this...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like a dark evil movie... And explain my point of view about life through my making of the movie.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wish i had a talent to do that.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">To write a script about it... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'll be rich and famous..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And ill have the devil to thank for..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Now, isnt that just great?? =D</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Sooooooo, weekend wasn't uber great.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">As you can already tell from my blogging style today.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">What was great was i finally got drunk.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So drunk i had to be carried by my 2 very hunky and awesome friends.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno how else i embarrassed myself.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Alll i knwo is got drunk.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i felt sooo bad for putting them 2 through that...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I tot they would never live to see the day i get that high...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I was wrong.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Never underestimate the strength of alcohol...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Screw that... What's worse is the pain...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">THE PAIN!!! THE EXCRUCIATING PAIN!!!!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I felt when i was drunk.. The pain in my gastric/stomach or wherever...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That pain is like something was eating my insides...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">And that pain? Combined with the fact that i was high...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Made me cry in pain like a baby...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which i think is what made the guys worried and panicky...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But yeap.. They got me home safe and sound...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">although not entirely cleaned up..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But there's only so much two very gentlemanly guys can do for a drunken ass girl..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So i woke up with a hangover, which i havent gotten in a long time.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And also, i woke up with the excruciating pain still there..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I tot eating would do me some good.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So i ate..And i puked... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I tot it was due to the drinking. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">So i waited till the hangover is recovered...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">WHile doing that i drank some milk to try and satisfy my grumbling tummy.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But nooo! That bastard would give up..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Whole day of Sunday i was crotched up in bed and on the sofa..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Trying to watch tv and do things to stay away from the pain.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Ate medicine from whatever i can find... Drank hot water trying to burn the apin away from the stomach.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I tot hot water seems a good idea cos it gives me 1 second of comfort... after i swallow..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Monday came.. I went to work like a zombie...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Puked even though i had nothing left to puke...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">My colleagues decided i should go home.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which i am grateful for because i swear i would have fainted if i had to face the computer for 2 more seconds.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Got to the doctor and he's putting me on meds...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He says if it doesnt get anybetter after about a month of taking the meds.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Ill have to go for a scope and they wil examine further treatments after getting agood look at what inside me.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Stupid bastardy acid eating up my insides...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I hope the medicine kills them motherfuckers.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">OH! And i also learnt something new...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">SMOKING affect gastric acids and all!! WOW!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">WOW RIGHT?? I mean all along i tot drinking was the devil...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Smoking is actually almost just as bad as drinking for my case!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So the doctor asked me to cut down on both... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">But he was understanding.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">for the first time, he's the first person that told me my drinking problem isnt a problem.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">It's only a problem when i wake up in the morning and the first thing i wanna do is drink.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Doesnt apply to me. I had drinking when i just wake up... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Not that i've done much of it...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But it sucks... Drinking is happy..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Waking up and going to drinking straight away.. Thats pathetic..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">LOL ... after i say this i better make sure i dun end up an alcoholic...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But Dr. Tan says im okay.. Im good... Dun worry about the drinking.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">He ask me to worry more about eating regularly and always eat before i drink.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And stop smoking... HAHA. He actually said a louder&nbsp;okay to drinking but a not so okay to smoking.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which shocked me. I always tot drinking is much worse a habit than smoking.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">MAYBE DR. TAN DRINKS TOO!! OMG...! That just occurred to me!!</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">MAYBE HE DOES!! WOW... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Total revelation... It'll be cool if my doctor drinks... lol..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then i know im not the only one thats crazy about drinking...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But on that note, i have to say...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'll be trying my best to stop drinking... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">No more little sneaks at the bottles displayed on my pathetic "bar top".</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe once in awhile if its a good night out and everyone's in the mood.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Maybe just then, ill drink..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Other than that i think ill try to stop... Cos drinking is expensive too.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">And my MOOLAAAHS are burning fast..</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Dunno how, dunno why...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I need to stay on track with the saving thing...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... Life's bitch without much money...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">So yup... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So much for blogging... I dun feel any better now than i did 20 minutes ago... =/ </span><br /><span style="color: black;">and the medicines arent working.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I need stronger pain killers...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">But Dr. Tan say stronger pain killer is injection.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And he cant inject me everyday.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Trust me... Injection painkillers work like magic... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">though only for a few hours.... still works like magic... =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">OKAYS!! Gonna go watch some tv now...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I like the show BONES... Awesome...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Makes me wanna be expert at something.. LOL.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Something good... i mean... =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">K BYE.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4134249048992974315?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-16550299785458766542010-11-27T18:09:00.000+08:002010-11-27T18:09:56.393+08:00<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jW_SYlJ1gYU?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jW_SYlJ1gYU?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>Like Barney &amp; Robin</strong> before they got together.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Minus the hooking up.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Thats its.... Thats just it.... Maybe that why i like HIMYM so much.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I feel how it feels to be Barney in that situation.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Plus yeah. Im awesome. =D</span><br /><span style="color: black;">LOL.</span><br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Jj925iOg8Rg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Jj925iOg8Rg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_f7ZkEx-tfI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_f7ZkEx-tfI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">YEAP! EXACTLY like Barney &amp; Robin.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Minus the sex and the hooking up and the end up together part.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Screw it. I like the part that they're close friends and even if they dont end up together.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think its awesome enough.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">The part that he says "I'm just a guy who's in love with that girl. And she'll never feel the same way."</span><br /><span style="color: black;">That part? Says it all. What media do to girls like me?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Give me false hopes. But i know, its false hopes.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Its obvious, he's out of my league. =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And im fine with that... TOTALLY... LOL!... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Awright.. Weekends YO!!! Awesome or what?? =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><em>Sand-to-the-Toe-to-the-Sa</em> baby... =D</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cant wait... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Drinks baby.. I cant wait&nbsp;for the drinking part. WOOO!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Need alcohol to get this shits out of my system...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Stooooopid feelings get in the way of happiness all the time... LOL.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I need to loosen up... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Oh by the way? I just got confirmed... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">CONFIRMED! WOW... I guess im sticking to this job for longer than planned.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">&nbsp;Okay... Gotta go get ready now.. BYE! =)</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1655029978545876654?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-10491361187014674322010-11-23T23:09:00.000+08:002010-11-23T23:09:15.781+08:00<span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Havent been updating for awhile now.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Been busy. Mostly with work. And drinking.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The other times that im not doing that im either hanging out with the LepaKings or just at home.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /><span style="font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">From tomorrow til Monday, ill be all alone at home.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Which sounds exciting. Yet a little scary.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have issues with loneliness.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've never liked being alone for too long.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I always need someone i love near me. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My parents &amp; Bryan are going to Malaysia.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My brother Wilson is gonna stay in camp cos there's a new batch of dragons coming in.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess im all on my own.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /><span style="font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Stocked up on food just now so that i can cook and feel independant.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If not ill just starve.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But with the thought of food around the house at least ill get my ass down to some cooking.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Im too lazy to shop for groceries when im alone.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6 days. Like field camp. LOL. Just without the field.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /><span style="font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So anyway, how have i been?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ive been okayy. Not much different.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Still think about the shit in the past from time to time.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Still miss having Allen around from time to time.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Regret certain things. Feel sorry for certain things.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Miss some friends that came and went.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /><span style="font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I dunno. Maybe im so addicted to drinking cos it makes me feel young and immature.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And young and immature me doesnt hurt as much as grown up mature me.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So yeah. Im just afraid that the loneliness the next 6 days will drive me to drink at home.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And i need to at least stay sober on weekday nights. cos of work.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well, i guess we'll see huh.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So yup. Isk has been in camp for couple of weeks now.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Wonder how Afiqa's holding up.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She'd better be holding up.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Or Isk will blame me for not looking after his byyyyyy....</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">AFIQA IF YOU'RE READING THIS!!!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">HOLD UP!!! HOLD UP GOOOOOOOOD!!!</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And yeap.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I got a msg for Keong too.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Keong, you gotta stay strong.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">you gotta believe that you can clean urself up.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">whether its for her or for yourself.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You clean yourself up good and you keep on trying.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If it doesnt work out, yeah balls.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We get get out our Kleenex and we can drink all sorts of beer.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But we'll pull through it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know it seems tough now and it seems like nobody understand the pain you're going thru.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know you've always felt fucked up in situations that you were not given a second chance.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But this fight isnt over.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Until you feel like there's absolutely no chance in hell you can get her back.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It isnt over. So clean yourself up. and show her.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We all make mistakes.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But if we clean up after that good enough.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess thats when the second chance comes.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe not immediately. Maybe we wont get exactly what we want when we want it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But if ultimately it gets us there. All the effort and pain we go thru now, i guess it'll be worth it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Just be sure. Be sure of what you want and your reasons for wanting them.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'll be rooting for your happiness til you get it. =)</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On the other hand, im rooting for my own happiness too.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But i guess i still havent found mine. or felt mine.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">like someone stole it away. FOR FAR TOO LONG!!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It been a year... A whole fucking year.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I need some external love soon or i swear i might end up a spinster.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I need hugs and kisses. I need goodnight messages.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I still need to like someone who likes me back... =(</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kind of suck.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You know i've been wondering?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How it would be like if Allen and I had 1 more day together.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Just one more 24 hours. What would we do?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How would it feel like? Like old times?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Would we fuck all the bullshit and just act like we just got together?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kiss awesomely, love awesomely, hug awesomely, look at each other with so much passion.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Would we? I mean, i think i could. I could fuck all the shit and pretend for 1 day...</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Just for that day, we were fucking awesome together.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But then again, thats how we spend our 2nd year anniversary.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And after that, things still went kaput.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess i had what i want now then.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But i never knew it. Til now.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I never knew that on 19th Dec 2009, it would have been the last real happy moment we had together.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe thats why i felt fucked up that night.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When he had to leave.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sigh. Fucked up feelings thinking about it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I should be over it by now.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Still rmb the process of trying to get over the fact that i lost it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That i lost the relationship i cherished the most since i started to learn how to love.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those talks i had. those tears i wept.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those emotions i tried to keep in place.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those efforts i put in to try to tallk things out.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fuck nothing worked.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Where am i now when it comes to Allen?</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Still the same&nbsp;exact place he left me a year ago.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And thats fucked up.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hate to admit it. Dont get me wrong guys.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I do wanna move on.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Really i do. So much so im willing to pay for it.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it doesnt work. Nothing works.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Like the fucking memories of what we share is some unbreakable bind.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">binding my fucking heart and soul to the fact that i love? loved? him.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">CB. Im frustrated at myself for talking so much about this.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But i need somewhere to let this out.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And recently, there havent been anywhere for me to say these out.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nobody wants to listen to a lovesick girl for a whole damn year.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and im happy just pretending allen means nothing to me anymore.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">SO!!! Apart from that, maybe in Dec ill be going to Hat Yai.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lets see how wild i can get.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Im going to go as far as the money i have brings me.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will test my level of courage.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will test my level of experience.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will test my level of willingness.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I want to go crazy.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And if i die there, it'll kinda suck.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I dun wanna die&nbsp;in Hat Yai.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Talking about holidays.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My Perth trip was awesome.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Went nuts. Kinda felt awesome.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Danced. Clubbed. Casino-ed. Drank. </span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Shopped. Talk cock with colleagues.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And talking about colleagues.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think.. I think... I think.. there's this guys who catches my eye...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">LOL. But its a forbidden fruit for more reasons than one.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">MANY reasons. He's like a big NO-NO!</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Although, in Perth, i think... we made good connection..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">LOL. Not THAT kind of connection.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But we shared some awesome moments.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But i think its as far as how sexciting my perth trip was.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many told me that i should have just fucked and go.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But i think i grew up. ONE forbidden fruit too many.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">LOL.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it was goooooooood~~ =) Im happier now after talking about my forbidden fruit.. =)</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And also, my colleagues and i are bonding quite well.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Although work still sucks cos there's a whole load of shit to do and im still pretty damn blur about many things.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think i can stay a little longer. No harm trying to elarn as much as i can.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Been thinking about being a teacher.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Or going on a crash diet and becoming a air stewardess or a airline cabin crew.</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Seems ambitious yes... I know..</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But no harm trying. I wanna experience the world before i grow old and become too depressed to do anything about my life.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">AWRIGHTs. too much words.. =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: &quot;Helvetica Neue&quot;, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">GOODNIGHT!!! =) Thanks for listening(reading) guys.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1049136118701467432?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-1520760002254588872010-11-21T06:10:00.001+08:002010-11-21T06:10:08.312+08:00Wow. I can blog with my phone. Watch SCV with my phone. Youtube or google anything. I have found new meaning in life guys. Thanks to dataplan. Wow. While I was busy discriminating iphone loverss. I haven't been living. Lol.<br /><br />Ok. Exaggeration. But still......<br /><br />Ok. Anyway. Today watched a movie RED by bruce willis. Fell in love with that man in the show. Bruce willis is HOT. Hes super charming. He can win my hear anytime. With him ill die hard. Lol!!! <br /><br />Sleep time. Gnite. <br /><br />By the way. Just for the records. I really do hope everything turns out well for keong. He hasn't been too good lately. Too many wrong decisions and bad timing. But things will get better. It will. <br /><br />:)<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-152076000225458887?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-26724235021199804092010-11-03T13:04:00.000+08:002010-11-03T13:04:11.485+08:00<span style="color: black;">Well, been awhile since i blogged.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">What has changed in this time?</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im going to Perth guyssssss....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">PEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRTTTTHHHHH.....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>GOOD BYE TO YOU ALL.... </strong></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I WILL MISS YOU....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I WILL BE BACK!!!! </span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">***</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>Was just wondering....</strong></span><br /><span style="color: black;"></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"></span><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">***</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">*****</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">*****</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">*****</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">*****</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">****</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>How many of you really thought that i was going off to perth for good? </strong></span><br /><span style="color: black;">HAHA... Company Trip to Perth.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Okays.. So Isk is going Army soon. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Danny's in OCS.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">TK is in BMT.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Harris is schooling.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Yeni is schooling.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fateha is working.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I am working.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Nobody has any time any more.. =(</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Life sucks .. Real bad...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I wanna be a child... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">=(</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-2672423502119980409?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-11287928775294761602010-10-19T08:01:00.000+08:002010-10-19T08:01:10.544+08:00Im lost.. =( Im lost about everything... =(<br /><br />FUCK.<br /><br />I dont like where i am now. Neither do i like who i am now...<br />I want to sleep.. Sleeeeep for a looooong looong time... <br />=(<br /><br />I want to runnnnnn awaaaaayyyyy.... <br />Nothing makes me feel better... Nothing now anyways... =( <br />I wanna go on loooong holiday... Run away from this society that expects me to conform to their sick practices..<br />What sick practices?? WORK! WORK I TELL YOU!! Fuck work. Fuck responsibility.. =(<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1128792877529476160?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-44232317917476421282010-10-10T14:22:00.000+08:002010-10-10T14:22:41.243+08:00<div style="text-align: center;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/PP_apsbNev8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/PP_apsbNev8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Sometimes we just wish to have someone like that. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Someone that makes us feel all funny inside.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And makes us happy even when everything covered in shit.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Makes you do the silliest things ever.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Laugh at the stupidest thing ever.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Lets you do funny things and laugh over it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I have that person.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That person is in the fantasies i build every night before i sleep.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That person is not only handsome, hott, totally my type.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">He is like the prince charming that i can ever drema of.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That person is ALSO!! Not real... =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Thats how i have been feeling the kind of love i feel ive been missing.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Every night before i sleep.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I imagine this person is real.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And how nice, warm and fuzzy everything will be...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If he would just hug me.... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And say the sweetest goodnight...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Share the awesome-mest goodnight kiss.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Then fall asleep with his arms around me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos at night when im alone in my room with my blanket over me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody gives a shit if im being silly and all girly and typical or not.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody gives a shit about my social status.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody cares if im being me or not.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody cares if im happy.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Its just me... ME &amp; my handsome boy...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Me and my baby... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And in reality? The hug? </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">It gets portrayed out as me hugging my bolster.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL... If anyone sees me sleeping.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You would know my baby is my bolster... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">My baby has a name that i shall not tell.. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">=)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So, the song above? </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Dedicated to my fantasy lover. For now i shall call him, <strong>Leeloy</strong>...&nbsp; =D</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who is a splitting image of the lover i wish i have right now.. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL!!! My fantasy lover changes his image along with the people i have feelings for in real life.. =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Thats the good thing about fantasy lovers.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They change to your liking.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Never for the worse.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You want him to be badass? HE BE BADAS!! </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You want him to be sweet and romantic? HE BE SWEET AND ROMANTIC!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You want him to be hott and steamy? HE BE HOTT AND STEAMY!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Fuck reality. Cos it fucks you all the time... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So, im suppoed to meet Harris and Logen today.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But Logen is late and he didnt set a place to meet.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Neither did he tell harris the time and place to meet.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So here i am.. Waiting... They both just woke up...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Well well... =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">_____________________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">DANNY'S GOING OCS!!! </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">WOOHOOO!! Happy for him.. =) </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Our dannyboy's becoming officer now..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">He gon' be great!! =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Hope he'll pull thru it. Come out a better person... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL.. cant wait to hear his experiences...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I'll be sending Isk off to NS.. hopefully...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just after i come back from Perth... =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And 2 months later... ISK IS GOING TO GO OCS!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">HE BETTER!!! LOL. Imma so proud of all my bros.. =) </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Although according to Wilson he said officer isnt much glory now.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Do all the SAIKANG. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">=( But yeah.... The experience thru the officer course is good. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">SO GO FOR IT GUYS!!!! BRING YOURSELF GLORY!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MAKE STORIES FOR YOUR FUTURE SONS &amp; DAUGHTERS...!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MAKE THEM PROUD!!! =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Like how im proud of my dad and my brother... =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Logen's in some Armour trooper thingy..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Which according to him is the worse vocation he can get... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wonder why he didnt get into sispec.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Think that would be better than armour thingy.. =\</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">_______________________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">OKAAAAYs.... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">On another note... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">The feelings i have for a certain someone?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">DEAD TO ME NOW!! DEAD I TELL YOU!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL.. YEah. decided.. Not worth it...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Not worth risking all those shits that MIGHT happen.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I guessi dun need no closure for this.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos yeah... Its stupid... Women should never follow their emotions.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Leads us to scary places.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Maybe ive been hanging ard too much with the boys.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But i realise... I have seen thru... how men think.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">and how men handle situations.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And how they can just decide to fuck it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And how they can just not think too much into certain things.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">and i realise. Lots of times.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Why men say bad tings about women. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Is because we give them something to talk about.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And also, men cant figure us women out for nuts. =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">works the other way round too...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">just that we women, find it easier to figure men out..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They're not so complicated after all...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Men are actually quite simple... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">As long as they are vocal and express their emotions properly.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">they're actually quite easy to please.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">WOMEN!! oin the other hand, is NOT easy to please.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Not at all...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">SO PLEASE!! ALL WOMEN OUT THERE!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">GIVE YOUR MEN A BREAK!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">AND ALL MEN OUT THERE TORTURING YOUR WOMEN!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">PLEASE FUCK OFF AND DIE!!! =)</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">OK. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna use a new word i just created.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MOFUCK!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL. Short form for mother fucker.. LOL</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MO FUCK!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MO FUCK!!! MO FUCK!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Fuuuuuuuck... =(</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-4423231791747642128?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-50377598216342553182010-10-06T18:48:00.001+08:002010-10-06T18:48:12.424+08:00<div style="text-align: center;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wrH1MLT_xM0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wrH1MLT_xM0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Favourite song, for now... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">__________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Well, life sucks baaaaaad for now... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Everything's screwing up and im not even joking.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">EVERYTHING!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">My family aint doing so good anymore.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">My pillar's kinda broken down. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I dont feel the need to live.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But apparently, some stupid cell in my brain, keeps telling me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I still need to. For certain reasons. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I want to run away.. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I really wanna run away and hide.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Fuck responsibility and fuck being adult and grown up.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Fuck facing the problems and biting the bullet.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Fuck all the bad things and fuck everything else that comes with it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just run away... Run away and come back when i feel like it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I want to run.... To a far away land. Or just die.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna lie in bed all day.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Watch movies until i slowly fade away.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna cry all day....</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But i dun wanna need anyone.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">It's irritating.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">This need, for someone.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Someone special to think that im someone special.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Someone special to treat me like im someone special.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">It's stupid.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women are stupid.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">We are needy...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">We are weak.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That is why we should only belong in the kitchen.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">All this pain wouldnt be so evident if once i grew up,</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I was raise and breeded in the kitchen and married off to a man.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who keeps me only in the kitchen. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Make love, make babies, pretend to like me life.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If i dont like my life, itll only be because my husband whacks and abuse me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Even then, i have a higher chance of dying. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Now im just left with the thought of wanting to die.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And the feeling of wanting to run away...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody understands. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos all of you just gonna say im stupid and irrational and useless..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Ha.. Think i dunno that already?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Thats why i wanna die, bitches.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So yeah.. Different people have different limits to the shit life gives.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I guess im just nearing mine...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You see, while im typing all this...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You guys prolly think "Mandy's being stupid and suicidal"</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">NOOPE! Not suicidal yet.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Dont have the guts to be.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wish i had though... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Anyways, </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Sum it all up.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Shit with friends aint going well.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Shit with family aint going well.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Shit with work aint going well at all.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Shit with love aint going well.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I have nothing. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I have nothing nice to live for, for now.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Yeah, everything seem so nice collaboratively.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Now you ask me to look at everything singularly.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They just dont seem so nice anymore.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Let me explain,</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Of course.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">My brother is still my brother even if shit happens.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But now, I have to love him seperately.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Not collaboratively.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Maybe in this sense, im still conservative.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos family IS family.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Family is a big group of people, you are born to love.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So yeah. I feel stupid, lousy and i dun need you guys to tell me what a loser im being.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna run and hide so bad. SO FUCKING BAD.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You guys have no idea.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I am not strong. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I am not strong at all.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im not all i put myself out to be.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im not awesome.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">All this shit sucked all the awesome-ness out of me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">In cases like this, when everything screws up at the same time?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I cant just stop being sad and be awesome instead.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I cant do it wing woman style.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I cant be Barney.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wish i can. I wish i had an on/off button..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But on the other note.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I am very appreciative of the people who have been listening out for me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Vey very appreciative of those who have been supportive, honest and helpful.<br />Those who tryto make everything seem better.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Those who screwed up that part too.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">at least you tried...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I realised these days, reasons why men are better when things really go wrong.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women are only good when you THINK things are going wrong and/or wnats things to go wrong.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women tend to think selfishly at times of trouble.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">and they let their emotions rule their fucking head.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They dun think about others.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They are TOO emotional. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They know it. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But they do shit to change it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Maybe cos they cant, like me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Or maybe cos they're oblivious to the fact that they're being unreasonable stupid over certain issues.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I dunno. But women? Totallu screwed up.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">God must have screwed someting up during production.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wish more women think with their pusssy like men than with their hearts.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">The hearts tend to lie.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Why do i say this?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women like to compare like nobody's business.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im sick of this shit.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They like to compare who treat them better than who.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who is more important than who.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who is better than who?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who makes them feel better than who? </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">When they weigh all those. WITH EMOTIONS!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Tehy end up with stupid conclusions.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And they fuck care what they really mean to others.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">MEN! On the other hand, see hard facts...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They base their theory on who really has been there.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And they think properly before they talk in messy situations.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They dont just blast their minds off, following their stupid emotions.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They try to justify it by being honest and straightforward.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Thats not it guys.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women? Are manipulative fucks. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That screw with your mind.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">See what im doing now?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im comparing... WHY??</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">cos im a fucking woman.. Typical..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Sigh... its every man for himself.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But i can tell you.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Women can turn their head on you, the second they walk away from you.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And they are the best pretenders.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They can hate you while they give you your comfort hug.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">They can think you're the lousiest person on earth while they joke to you about how awesome you are.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Then again, men can do the same.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Maybe men is only better cos they follow on with this lie..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Unlike women, they can only pretend for so long... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">After awhile its like they reached their limit and they cant pretend to like you anymore.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And they dun tell you subtly.&nbsp; They burst. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Men just stop hanging out with you... and you should get the hint.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If you dont, they'll just leave you out of big events and hope you get the hint.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If you still dont, they torture you with acts to screw you up.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Well suck balls..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">These next few weeks gonna be hell for me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">These few weeks im gonna hate life.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And Im not even gonna pretend i like it.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im not even gonna pretend that im happy about all thats happening.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I want someone special..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Here, just to spend watsed time with me, and tell me every 5 minutes that all this shits gonna go away soon.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just hug me and tell me its gonna be alright.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And make me alugh with silly acts and jokes.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Watch how i met your mother with me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Bring me to swings all around singapore and watch me while i play. Or just play with me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Sing out loud when we are at the highest point of swinging.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I want someone who will call me princess. Treat me like a fucking princess.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Dont want shopping dont want clothes dont want money.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just want someone to be full of hugs and kisses.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">To be full of smiles. Smile my smile for me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Feel my pain.. And understand that right now i cant be awesome.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">be awesome for me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just want a special someone, doesnt have to be my boyfriend.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Just for now, being my soulmate.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Send me flowers with cards to tell me that everythings gonna be alright...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">That even if the world falls apart. And i really do choose to die.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">He's gonna be there for me. I dunno how.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But the tone he uses and the way he says it gonna convince me that that's achievable.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I want that person to know that every 5 minutes i feel like breaking down.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">To know that everything in me is broken and slowly fading away.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And help me to catch back whatever is left of me.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">build me up. Show me future is still nice.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">But fuck that. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos no god is&nbsp;THAT good to anyone.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And there is no god.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So none of that shits gonna happen.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Not even relatively.'</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">So im gonna fucking die.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">No soulmate.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">No pretentious kind of love.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">No crap. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And if like what you guys say?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I pull through this shit?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Im still gonna wanna die.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cos the next shit thats gonna come, is prolly not so far away.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Once again i emphasize, life is full of shit.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">When you think the worse is over.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">It out beats itself.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">its like the moments are chalenging in a competition.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Who is shittier??</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Well, currently this moments wins...</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I call this moment, "Moment ESU (Everything Screws Up)"</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">sigh. Fucking failure.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Cant even go thru this kinda shit strong. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">dun wanna be a woman.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Dun wanna be emotional.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Dun wanna wear my emotions on my sleeve.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">dun wanna be weak and susceptible to these screw ups.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">ARGHHHH!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Why must everything go wrong at the same low point? </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Why cant just SOME things go wrong?</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">When i was just about to start fixing up some wrongs.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Something else screws up!!!</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I miss my Mama..</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna die and go to where ever she is.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Look at earth and laugh. Laugh the biggest laugh ever.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And say that im all over life.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">DYING IS....</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">SO FUCKING YESTERDAY.... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">CHEEBAI.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-5037759821634255318?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-56493117106585901022010-09-26T14:55:00.000+08:002010-09-26T14:55:48.148+08:00<div style="text-align: center;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wvJrhq6uPJA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wvJrhq6uPJA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been thinking. The whole night last night since I went home. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I thought about a lot of things..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Typical girl behaviour happened.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I think. the worse thing a girl can ever do. Think.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #cc0000;">Stupid girls should never think cos they'll just hurt themseleves.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: purple;">Smart girls should know better than to think about life, love and anything involving this kinda stuffssss....</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So I think i belong in the second category.. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But I didnt know better... I should've known better.. =(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So I think, and I thought.. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And I felt stupid. As much as i'd like to believe im not stupid...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So anyway,&nbsp;the song you see above? </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Kinda wraps up how i feel about a <strong>certain someone.</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;">It is stupid, and useless..</span> </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">It is the worse thing i have done since Allen.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;">He is a friend.. Things should just stay the way it is...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I should not dream of anything more and I should never have even thought that there was even a slight possibility.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Because of the sole fact that <strong>there is none</strong>...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">None what so ever, ray of hope, that implies that, this dream/imagination of mine..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Can become real... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to constantly remind myself. Nothing can come out of this lust/infatuation.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I believe, it is due to the loneliness... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Abstinence from intimacy and stuff..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Has probably made me feel the need for some.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;">And he's the only one, </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">that is wanna share this craving with..</span> </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But its a stupid thought...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">=(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Apart from that...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I think.. And I thought some more...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And I reflected on my behaviour for the past month or so... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been drinking. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And even, when I'm not drinking I'm craving for a drink.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I don't know why.. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So anyway, I came to the conclusion.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I am going to change...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to get rid of this stupid feeling i have ...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And I need to be awesome again.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been acting childish. Immature...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been faking too many smiles with friends.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been craving too much sympathy from loved ones.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I havent been grown up at all...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been dependant...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been expecting friends to be there for me and to make me happy...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been wanting friends to treat me like a princess...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And when it doesnt happen that way, </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been feeling pitiful and sad... =(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><strong><u>This.. Is... Stupid..</u></strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><strong><u>This.. Has.. To... STOP.</u></strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to grow up. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Bcos if i dont, I KNOW, for a fact...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">That months down this road...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I will cry every night.. And i will feel stupid...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Why i didnt stop myself when its still early?</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I know myself.. I know if i hide this feelings longer.. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">One day i will be rash and do something stupid.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Like tell him/show him, that i do, and have been.. secretly.. liking him...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">THAT!! My friends, will prove to be a major disaster.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">As Isk and so many others have reminded me...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Okay, it's only been Isk..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Nobody else told me about how its stupid and useless...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But I know, Isk is right...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Nothing can/would come out of these feelings... =(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I heard the song today, and i dunno why i teared. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I guess the harsh truth Isk told me last night.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">kinda took its effect today..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">BUT!! I'll get over it...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to enforce some rules in my life...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to get myself away from the object of this emotions..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">As much as i dun want to..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">As much as i love his company and etc...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need, to seperate myself from this stupid emotions i feel.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Its getting worse by each weekend.. =(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">and every Sunday, I feel stupid.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Because I start to think most on the Sunday.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: x-small;"><strike>I start to count down to the weekends..</strike></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: x-small;"><strike>Not because i dont have work. But because of what i will normally do during the weekends...</strike></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I should stay home... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">&nbsp;I really should... =( </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to make a choice. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And in the past, I always followed my heart and believed in the impossible.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But reality always kicks me hard in the butt...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Now? There's much on the line...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">for the first time it occurs to me, friendship? Or lust? </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This time? I choose friendship... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Love hasnt been nice to me since Allen..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">and I dun think it'll change its mind and be nice to me so soon...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">It always fucks me for a few years then give me a good one for awhile..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #073763;">Everytime i drink, i think.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #073763;">Drinking doesnt go well with thinking. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #073763;">It makes us think funny...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">___________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I thought about work.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Where i want myself to be in a few years time.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">and as much as i feel that at the rate im going, ill lose this rat race.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But I kept telling myself, its ok.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Even if i dun become successful.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I know ive tried. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">A normal life... Just live it, for my family...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And for whoever else that THINKS they need me.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">for those who believe that without me in their lives, it would be like trying to fly without wings..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I will live for those i believe believes in me...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And I will try my best.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">and when life knocks me down, ill get back up.. =)</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Thats what my brother told me...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><em><span style="color: black;">"Yknow the song "Sometimes love comes around, when it knocks you down just get back up when it knocks you down, knocks you down..." It doesnt apply only to love. Life's a bitch. Get up. Fight thru it all. You will come out of it a better person. "</span></em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I wanna be a better person. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">To be that better person, I need to stop acting...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to stop trying so hard to be loved...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need to stop trying so hard to get the kind of attention that i want...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">those who leave me because i have stop making funny jokes, ir because i am no longer the same happy me...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They dun love me like i think they do...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So lets put this to the test... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Im changing...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I WILL CHANGE!!! </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And im sorry for/if i hurt anyone in thsi process...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Its a hard road...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">trying to deatch myself away from alot of feelings that has been in me for quite awhile now..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Trying to break the habit...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I dun wanna screw up anymore..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I realy really dont... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And it just feels like nobody understands... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Even though supportive and encouraging..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">It feels like nobody understands...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And the disappointment i have about myself...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Eats me up and spits me out to dry in the sun... =(</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">All Love, Lust, Life, Work, and everything else except family..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Is being a bitch to me..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;"><strike>I need to drink... </strike></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;"><strike>Alone... DRINK... ALONE....</strike></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">SOrry for this whining session. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Just need somewhere to vent...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Where i wont feel stupid after wards..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">every Sunday, when i look back on the weekdays and the weekends...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Since i dunno when...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I have been feeling stupid...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So, if i detach myself from the outside world..</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Maybe then...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I wun do anything, or feel anything silly...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Hais.. Im sorry guys...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Like how Isk needed to disappear and recharge a few days back.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I need that now...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Disappear and recharge... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And somehow, it feels like nobody cares or really gives a shit...</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">BYE.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-5649311710658590102?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-66446113578274232782010-09-23T13:13:00.000+08:002010-09-23T13:13:00.917+08:00ZAWrightttttt... Work's starting to get better. Maybe because i try hard as hell to change my attitude. Try to put less pressure on myself and focus on learning and doing things and screwing up without feeling fucking stupid... =\ Thanks to my parents, my friends, and my family too. For those encouraging words and for believing in me.. =)<br /><br /><br />Macam i already fucking good lidat... =|&nbsp;&nbsp; lol.. =)<br /><br />K. Work starts...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6644611357827423278?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-36298414271214585982010-09-22T12:55:00.000+08:002010-09-22T12:55:15.251+08:00<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;">Ok. The best interesting thing i can do now is to change the fucking font.&nbsp; =( </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">I just dont have the ability/feel like of blogging/using the computer when i'm at home. Monday to Friday stare at computer all day. GO HOME STILL MUST STARE AT COMPUTER??? KNN...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Hais... So my dad cleverly went to tell my uncle about me crying and stuff.. =( Now i think my uncle's gonna talk to me during the weekends.. =( I dun wanna feel stupid and cry again.. =(&nbsp; But my dad did that, cos he wanted to know from a 3rd person point of view, if its really how i say it is... And my uncle said it's true. The system? They're changing the system soon. So I just have to pull through this period now. And when they change to use SAP system... Everything will be better...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Wanna know why? Cos, I wun be the only one feeling stupid. Every other person who doesnt know how to use SAP will feel stupid too!! LOL...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Skiddin;.. Actually the whole point why i cry is cos i feel lousy that i cant even withstand such little pressure and disappointment.. I thought i was strong. Then again, I always think wrongly about myself.. I tend to over estimate at the wrong time and under estimate at other wrong times. So basically Im always wrong... When it comes to myself... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">_____________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">So I'm sorry it's all words and no pictures... I noe i promised more awesome cute pictures of me when i looked like ang moh baby.. But Im sorry... I think that wouldnt happen for a long time... =\</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">______________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">For those who dont already know.. Im going on a company paid trip to Perth in November.. Looking forward to it.. =)&nbsp; Well, take it as a chance to hang around office people.. Try to blend in.. Be one with the crowd... =/ LOL. I dunno... sometimes, i miss Brussels Sprouts...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Which is exactly WHY!!!!! I went to brussels to work one Sunday afternoon... For 5 hours... It was like a dream... I mean, minus away the kind of attitude i get from one particular chef during service hour... I think, it went awesomely well... Everyone kinda made me happy.. =) It felt good... Felt like, i was alive... But i know, with me? It's always "Grass is always greener on the other side"... So even if i go back and work at Brussels, soon enough ill start complaining about working there.. And i know for sure, cos' BS has lost it's feel alr.. It's not the same anymore. Gavin's gone, Mark's gone, Fid's gone, so many people that defined BS last time, is gone.. =(&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">____________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I need to buy more clothes... I need to treat my uncle to a good dinner for introducing me this job... I need to treat my family... I need to treat my friends... I need to drink...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Ok.. Those are NOT needs.. WANTS... I want... Want want want... =D</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">K BYE.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-3629841427121458598?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-79922184988981711492010-09-21T13:03:00.000+08:002010-09-21T13:03:19.596+08:00<span style="color: black;">I dont think i will have the time to blog every day anymore. Since i started work. Its different.. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">To cut the story short about work. I cried to my dad yesterday about how disappointed i am at myself over work. That's about it... =)</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Ok. So apart from that... My brother, Wilson, is now a SIR! An OFFICE-SIR! Yes he is an officer because i went with my family and Clar to his commisioning parade last Saturday. It was nice. Nobody cried. Was a happy occasion. Although i feel that some happy tears would have dramatised the situation and made it better. But it was good. =) My brother's friends are hott... =) LOL. He hates that i have eyes for his friends... He's always criticizing my taste anyway. Wonder when will my brother ever go "YEAH BALLS! THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT!!" .. I always do that for him. I dun criticise his taste. Unless its really damn bad... LOL...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">So, I havent been eating well lately. Stress and stress i guess. Just stress... I feel lousy... And I've been drinking.. But not because i feel sad... Just that we were all in the mood. And i needed alchohol to make me happier.. So alcohol did the trick... Even though i broke down once, i dun think the alcohol did it. cos i drank little. I just needed an excuse to cry in front of everyone and tell them how fucking sad i am.. HAHA...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">No matter how we hate to admit it.. Crying in front of others, helps sometimes... Makes us feel like we're important. Unless you cry and your friends go " fuck you crybaby, so old alr still cry.. you useless or you stupid?" or as danny would put it.. "Are you born stupid or grew up retarded?" </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Anyhoooos, yeah... Life a bit of a mess right now. But i do appreciate the support i get from my family and friends. Every weekend nights&nbsp;spent with Danny, Isk, Harris and all, has made me a happier person. Every weekday nights spent at home has reminded me of what love actually is.. So... Im contented... Even though loneliness hits in at times, im okay... =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: #990000;">My dad msged me today ...</span><br /><br /><em><strong><span style="color: #990000;">"A strong person knows how to keep their life in order. Even with tears in their eyes, they still manage to say "I'm ok" with a smile. it is perfectly ok to tear when you are sad. everyone will go through this learning process and once you go thru it, u will be a better person. Trust me, Be strong and learn as much as you can. Manage your expectations and pressure. As often as i say, I will always be at your side. Papa and Mummy will always be with you no matter what happens."</span></strong></em><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">This also goes out to all my friends and family members who feels like shit... =) </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Its gonna be ok.. =)</span><br /><br />GTG. Lunch time over!! =)<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-7992218498898171149?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-25472711735010576592010-09-14T13:05:00.000+08:002010-09-14T13:05:21.998+08:00QUICK POST<br /><br />Attended my uncle's wedding the other day. Was fun. Great seeing him finally getting&nbsp; married. The guy that solemnised them was funny. Almost made me cry though. Cos he kept emphasizing on life partnering and how you have to protect, love and live with your partner forever. And how you must commit. And go thru shits tgt. GREAT. I need to find a husband. I feel lonely at times.<br /><br />I didnt have a partner at the wedding. Which made it worse cos my bro and my cousin brought their gf. I felt fucking stupid. But it was ok. Cos it was fun. Saw my grandparents siblings. Rmb, miss my grandparents so much..<br /><br />K. GTG.<br />BYE LOVE<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-2547271173501057659?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-62455878850649844082010-09-07T13:13:00.000+08:002010-09-07T13:13:27.257+08:00<strong><span style="color: black;">STEALING A POST FROM AMALINA'S BLOG.</span></strong><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Some how, I feel exactly the same way... Almost everyday... even til now... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Wish I could tell her the feeling like this won't last... But it does... =\</span><br /><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">"Times like this is when im in desperate need of happiness.sometimes when i think i feel sadness for too long,i dont even know where to begin to find happiness again. and when i tot im feeling happy,things go the other way round again. And i get fed up with everything.i started to blame anything/anyone else for not making the situation better. till to the point i just cant be bothered anymore,and dats when i feel happier.When i just dont bother......BUT it always end short and the whole emotional cycle comes around again. Most of the time,the heart just aches and it still does...</span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong><br /><strong><br /><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">especially when things just go wrong..</span></em></strong><br /><strong><br /><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">was just caught up in the moment of frustrations and things get bad...</span></em></strong><br /><strong><br /><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">im still sorry dear friend.haiz.</span></em></strong><br /><strong><br /><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">my life will be so much better just to know tt u still care.</span></em></strong><br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;">I dunnoe how long this will take.i seriously have no idea.it just takes time,and i need to get use to it..and at the end of the day,i will know the answers to all this."</span></em></strong> <br /><strong><em><span style="color: purple;"></span></em></strong>&nbsp; <br /><span style="color: black;">Yeah... That's how it is... That's how it still is... Sometimes i get angry at my friends and stop talking to them because now i depend on them to find happiness. So when they arent making me happy, I immeidately naturally start to feel like nobody loves me... Yet ultimately, i know my friends and FAMILY are all i have left. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"></span>&nbsp; <br /><span style="color: black;">Yes.. And I dont know hwere happiness starts... I mean, how do you feel something you feel like has been stolen away from you? HOW? LOL..</span> <br /><span style="color: black;"></span>&nbsp; <br /><span style="color: black;">K. Lunch time finish liaoooooo..... BACK TO WORK!!! </span><br /><span style="color: black;"></span>&nbsp; <br /><span style="color: black;">TAKE CARE PEOPLE!!! GO FIND THE&nbsp;PERSON WHO STOLE YOUR HAPPY... <strike>AND.... SHOW HIM YOUR NEW HAPPY!!</strike> =D </span><br /><span style="color: black;"></span>&nbsp; <br /><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;">Fuck positivity... =(</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6245587885064984408?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-35582817599673747532010-09-06T08:02:00.000+08:002010-09-06T08:02:40.915+08:00<span style="color: black;"><strong>New Job started. My 4 th day today</strong>. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Am slightly early at work so decided to sneak in a post.<em> No time for pictures. </em></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sorry. =( </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Celebrated dad's birthday at KUISHINBO last night before sending Wilson back to camp.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>Was fun. Had fun.</strong> Bought Dad a coin pouch that he has been wanting to get since his is old. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Went home. Sleep cos today i had to wake up at 5 am... =( Sucks. Somehow i wished i stayed at jurong.. =\</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Went to visit my grandparents's ashes yesterday too. I cried abit but had to hide the tears cos everyone else was&nbsp;there..</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong><span style="font-size: large;">I miss her.</span></strong> I miss my grandma... =(&nbsp; And I cried at night cos i missed her. And i dunno what came over me. I started talking to her. Out loud. Asking her where she is and if she is listening. Then i told her about the shit im going through. And all the memories of her looking after me and her last few months came floating back. Then i cried myself to sleep.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh. I wish she was still around. I never knew how much she made me happy untril she was gone. Crap.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Oh yah. Some thoughts came to me this morning while i was taking the train. About life and the devil and such. No time to blog about that. =) Another time.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Bye.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-3558281759967374753?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-50799738174131791162010-08-31T15:29:00.000+08:002010-08-31T15:29:40.335+08:00<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">TODAY'S POST!</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;"><strong>AWESOME PICTURES OF ME WHEN I WAS YOUNG!!!</strong></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyql4O2yMI/AAAAAAAABDU/IDv-MxFk84s/s1600/SNC01187.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyql4O2yMI/AAAAAAAABDU/IDv-MxFk84s/s400/SNC01187.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Aren't I just the cutest??!?!? ^_^</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqznXBNII/AAAAAAAABDk/XbKjAY_5dXo/s1600/SNC01200.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqznXBNII/AAAAAAAABDk/XbKjAY_5dXo/s400/SNC01200.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Biker chic since young... LOL...</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">See the fierce-ness in my face?</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Don't fuck with me.. =D</span></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqs56K-vI/AAAAAAAABDc/n3hVLhfzYHA/s1600/SNC01191.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqs56K-vI/AAAAAAAABDc/n3hVLhfzYHA/s400/SNC01191.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">YEAH BALLS....</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Im such a fucking angel, even I can't believe it... ;)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqEl92HwI/AAAAAAAABCs/XOhvD_O4WC0/s1600/SNC01131.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqEl92HwI/AAAAAAAABCs/XOhvD_O4WC0/s400/SNC01131.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Okay this one's abit awkward. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">See, im demure.. I neve like exposing too much skin. LOL..</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">What if I wear that NOW?? </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LOL. SCARY!!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqRo9k6BI/AAAAAAAABC8/QW8U7Zzp7vA/s1600/SNC01138.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqRo9k6BI/AAAAAAAABC8/QW8U7Zzp7vA/s400/SNC01138.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So young, so emo... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqYQ_McrI/AAAAAAAABDE/dsE3yd24D1o/s1600/SNC01143.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqYQ_McrI/AAAAAAAABDE/dsE3yd24D1o/s400/SNC01143.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Another of my favourite photo..</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Smiling so brightly here...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Kinda make me wish i was back to the good old days...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqeum-iiI/AAAAAAAABDM/3FgWu43uFoY/s1600/SNC01167.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqeum-iiI/AAAAAAAABDM/3FgWu43uFoY/s400/SNC01167.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Look at BEAUTIFUL me!! =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">__________________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">AND MY FAVOURITE PICTURE IS........</span></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqLSh2hDI/AAAAAAAABC0/cgFXxComcEw/s1600/SNC01134.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THyqLSh2hDI/AAAAAAAABC0/cgFXxComcEw/s400/SNC01134.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><br /><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">HAHAHA!!</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Isn't this hilarious?? Like twins!!! </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">And our expressions!! Classic.. LOL..</span></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I got plenty morepictures to share.. More than 100 pictures... </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Was looking through old photos... </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Remembering old times. Laughing.</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Was amazed at how true it is that i didnt look chinese as a baby.</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">My parents said they were so proud...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Everyone called me ANG MOH baby...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">LOL. I asked my mother if she was sure i'm here biological daughter...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">She said "No. Pick you up from someplace dunno where..."</span></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">HAHA....</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I wish i have a dream, that i'm back to being a child...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Or that i'm back in time when my mum and dad were in love and dating...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">When i look at the old photos.. I feel happy...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I also, feel, the longing-ness... To want to feel the same kind of happy i felt...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Being a child, with silbings and cousins to play and fight with, ROCKS.</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Being a child, with no needs except to eat, sleep and drink, and be loved by your family... ROCKS.</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Being a child, ROCKS.</span></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Plus I looked BEAUTIFUL when i was a child.</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">NOW? </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I don't know... </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Things change... </span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">My looks changed.. No longer, cute nor angelic...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">My heart changed. No longer inoocent, nor genuine...</span></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><strong><span style="font-size: large;">HAHA... </span></strong></div><div align="center"><strong><span style="font-size: large;">MORE PICTURES TO COME!!! =D</span></strong></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-5079973817413179116?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-81213070681348092092010-08-30T12:56:00.002+08:002010-08-30T12:59:46.508+08:00<span style="color: black; font-size: large;">MORNING TO THE PEOPLE OF <strong>MANDY</strong>TOPIA ....</span><br /><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">_______________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Today's Topic : Singlehood, Random Stuff, Being Fat &amp; <strong><span style="background-color: #9fc5e8;">Description of my close friends</span> </strong><em>(highlight)</em>....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Yesterday while talking to Isk about stuff. I realised, I think I've kind of been single for 9months now. WOW! 9 months! Felt like just yestrday Allen and I broke up. Felt like just yesterday I thought I was falling in and out of love. And&nbsp;I lasted and mourned for about 9 months now. Maybe more... I don't know. <strong>I dont think I can remember exactly when Allen and I broke up. Maybe my mind chose to delete of that part of the memories...</strong>&nbsp;But one thing I know and remember, that the last happy moment we had was exactly on our 2nd year anniversary... And I think before that we were already officially broken up.. But on our 2nd year... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">We decided to meet up... Just for old times sake... It was like the day you know you're dying, you decide to make the best out of it. So that day was the last time, we pretended to be a happy couple... Ok. I wouldn't say <em>"PRETEND"</em>. We felt like a couple. But somewhere deep down inside there's this feeling like we know we cant work things out. As if, we knew that it probably would be the last chance we have to be happy with each other. We catched toys at the arcade. We shopped around abit. We ate.. Like a normal date... Back to my house to watch soccer... Took some pictures... <strong><span style="background-color: #fce5cd;">Then he left....</span></strong></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">After that day, I think, everything else just seem a blur to me. How he begged, how&nbsp;I resisted... How I begged.. How he resisted.... How he liked another girl... How I felt when i realised... that... its... no... more... That he doesnt even wants to be friends at all. He said what he said, I guess, cos it was the polite thing to say... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">So, 9 months ago. 19th Dec 2009... Was the last happy memory I can think of.... Last happy memory.. Not the ONLY... Recently.. All I can think of are the happy times we had.. I kind of forgot why I was so determine to screw things up.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh... <strong>9 months</strong>... I cant remember the last time&nbsp;I stayed single for 9 months, since my first real boyfriend.... They're telling me pigs will fly... They're telling me my time will come... Suddenly I realise that I'm NOT waiting for my time to come. Just felt like, my time came, and went... There's no other TIME. Just ONE time. And sometimes when I give advice to my friends. I stop and think. And&nbsp;I ask myself... Can I, or will I, practice what&nbsp;I preach? And most&nbsp;of the time, the answer is NO. Cos' every advice, every suggestion, every hint. Just doesnt seem to apply. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Well, at least I know now, that the girl he was after, didnt deserve him at all. Fucking slut used him, and then went back to her ex. So what if she's slim, slender and fucking average looking? No heart, No conscience... Did she tried as hard to love you? To make anything work? Fuck.&nbsp;Told you guys and TOLD him, I could love im much better. I know for a fact I can love him so much better. And I'll be the best motherfucking girlf EVER. But nobody believes me. Most importantly HE doesnt believe me. haha... Nevermind lor.. Let him go out and find... Let him go out and try... Try to find that one girl that treats him better than I will/would have. Knows him better than I did. And help him be the best/better like I did. He's not going to find her...&nbsp; </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Talk anymore about this and this day will turn gloooooomy... So next topic!!! =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;">________________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I cant wait for my new distraction to start... Wednesday... BIG DAY! =) New job.. YAY!! </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Had such a heavy breakfast... Craaaap.... Nasi lemak with tons of chilli.... LOL. I think the one thing I'll miss here is the malay's stall chilli. LOL. </span><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">FULL FULL FULL FULL FULL FULL FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT...</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Everyone I know and hang out with is telling me I'm getting fatter and fatter each time they see me... =( My mum's telling me that I prolly wouldnt be able to fit into the dress I bought to wear at my uncle's wedding...&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; =( I'm scared... I don't want to be super fat... I'm already quite fat.. SUPER fat will kill me... =(&nbsp; Like get me all emo and I'll start cutting myself and die... HAHA... Joking lah... Fat fat lor... Die die lor.. hor??? Maybe fat people got more heart... =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Like my mum always says "Nice looking boys are seldom really nice.... Get the ugly ones... "</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Think I've tried quite a few ugly ones... They're just as bad.... What's the difference... REALLY???</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I want to get my heart broken by a girl.... for a change.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">_______________________________</span><br /><br /><strong><span style="background-color: #ffe599; color: #cc0000;">NOW!!! FOR THE HIGHLIGHT OF TODAY'S POST!!!</span></strong><br /><br /><strong><span style="color: purple; font-size: large;">Description of my close friends</span></strong><br /><br /><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Aryani</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">8 years of friendship.</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">Got closer only in Sec 2... Continued from there... Stuck by each other through so many things and situations. She's cute... She's&nbsp;physically violent when it comes to people she's close with... She has no hesitation. When you say something she doesnt like, she'll hit you. And god, when she hits you? You'll be left wondering how can a GIRL, the size of a peanut and the height of a ruler, inflict so much pain?? LOL. She gives really lousy advices at times... And when you point out her mistakes, she'll find a lame excuse for making the mistakes she makes. She seldom apologises for the stupid things she do.. But when she does, you forgive her almost immediately for being an idiot because if you see the sad look on her face, you don't find the heart to stay mad at her. She fights back. She fights back with her friends. But when it comes to normal people that she's not familiar with, she becomes a little shy. But it takes her a second to like or hate someone. Just gotta approach her and you'll see she's not so fierce or cute at all.. But there's something about her that gets to you. She doesnt like it when&nbsp;you judge people you don't know. Like when you say another girl is super fucking ugly like PER PER FELICIA TEO. She gets a little mad at me for saying bad things about people&nbsp;I don't know. But she herself laughed out loud when she saw her photo. But she helps me stay grounded. To remember to not be a&nbsp;bitch at times and to be nice... Even when&nbsp;she's not being nice to me.. She expects and would scold me any chance she has, to BE NICE. And when I'm with her, I'm nice...&nbsp;=) She thinks&nbsp;I exaggerates alot and sometimes she probably thinks I talk too much... Sometimes without her saying anything or around me... I find myself questioning... "What would Yeni say if&nbsp;she finds out Im doing this?" She's one of the two girls that I go to when it&nbsp;comes to guys, when it comes to girls, when I'm happy, when I'm sad, When I whine, When&nbsp;I'm&nbsp;bored, When I'm lonely, When I need cheering on... =)&nbsp;No matter what I do that she hates to accept or that she doesnt agree with, she still listens... And she seldom gets pissed at me... I hate to see her cry... And I think for all the times I know her.. I have only made her cry once or twice.. But she made me cry countless times... Sometimes the things she says hurts you. It hurts you deep because she doesnt realise how much you love her.. And when she see tears in your eyes.. thats when she feels guilt, and she realises you mean what you say... Then she learns to forgive you for whatever you did. And she learns that everyone has their flaws... She empathises... <strong>And she loves me..</strong>&nbsp; &nbsp;=D</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Fateha</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">5-6 years since i was first introduced to her...</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">Tough on the outside and super soft on the inside. And when you tell her that? She'll act tougher for you.. Just to prove to you that she's not all that soft... The tougher she acts, the softer she actually is... She tries hard to block out any threat to her heart. She yearns the attention of the people she loves. She loves it when we surprise her. When we make her feel like a princess. She likes protection. Even if at times she says she can take care of herself, she likes the fact that people want to protect her. She likes to try different things. But she will always want/need to have someone dependable around whenever she wants to try something new. She's afraid to build cos she's afraid to fall. Maybe cos the last fall fell too hard... Sometimes you need to let her win, even when you know she's not entirely right, you let her win. She knows, you're just giving in.. And she'll appreciate it, then she'll realise she's wrong, and she'll come around and apologise... She's sensitive when it comes to being bias... If you treat someone better than you treat her, she'll sense it immediately. You can see it in her face... But you wait, just to see if she does anything about the jealousy she feels. Normally? She doesnt do anything... She just keeps quiet... Like most girls.... Then after awhile, she'll tell you why she's feeling down... Cos she's afraid we dont love her the same anymore... She wants/needs constant reassurance... She's like a baby.. and she loves it when you try hard to please her and make her smile or cheer her up... She's the kind that would smile for you.. If she loves you... She'll try to cheer you up... Even when she knows you're&nbsp;not the kind that would be cheered up&nbsp;if someone TRIES to&nbsp;cheer you up... She wants to be constantly there for you. But she waits for you to tell her you need her. Cos maybe she doesnt want to come out too eager cos she's afraid we might push her away. Sometimes when she knows&nbsp;she has done something wrong, she'll wait for you to say something about it or reprimand her. Then she'll show that puppy/kitten face... And she'll say sorry like you HAVE to forgive her kind of sorry. And when you&nbsp;inevitably smile and tell her while you roll your eyes that she'd better not do something stupid like that again, she'll give you a hug/kiss and tell you she loves you. Cos she's thankful that you accept her for&nbsp;her rights and wrongs. She doesnt just love any old body...&nbsp;<strong>But she loves me...</strong> =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Harris</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">Known each other for 8 years. </span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">Will always remember the first incedent that fatefully brought us closer together as friends... Peer support group session.. Peer leader teased Harris and I. Harris got pissed. Went to the toilet... Cried... Came back like a red faced teddy bear. Never talked to me for a looooong time... Lower sec, we always argued... He always disturbed me and I always fight back. He was rebellious and so was I. Somehow, friendship just fell into place. The first time he came to me for advice on girls... Our first sexual discussion. HAHA... I like to think that I'm the one that taught him how to first touch a girl's boobs... HAHA... Embarrassing fact. But memorable moments in our friendship. We fight alot... We argue alot.. Sometimes we disagree with the way we handle things... We see things differently sometimes.. And he's the kind that would push you til the end, just so you would say that he's right... He doesnt like an easy win. So he asks for a good argument and a good fight... And if you dont give him and argument, he somehow, some sort, makes you feel like you've lost the biggest battle in your entire life... He makes you feel like you have no stand on anything and you're just a follower... he makes you want to be special. And he makes you want to win him just so that you can show him you're not what he says you are... But he means no harm... He's hot tempered, sometimes... Bad, when he's drunk. He can say the nicest sweetest things to you when you least expect it. And these nice things comes in small bundles so when he does nice things to you? Accept it, show appreciation&nbsp;and shut up cos if you say anything else/more, he'll take it as you're saying he's being too nice, or that you don't appreicate it. Then he wont do the same nice thing for you anymore. In fact, he seldom does the same nice things to you twice... He hates it when people act stupid and crazy when he's feeling down and upset over something, and he'll give you the attitude/stare to show you his displeasure. He hates it when he's being serious and into a conversation and you just cut in and say something lame and irrelevant... He doesnt like a lot of things and he's one who speaks up. And sometimes, its scary when he gets pissed at you cos you dunno when he'll be okay after that. But yet, at times&nbsp;you know you apologizing wont help anything because he doesnt listen when he's angry. And when he's all calmed, you apologizing to him, his reaction will make you feel like you're just over-reacting to his anger... You dunno where's the balance with him.. Amongst all my friends? He's the most unstable one.. But that's what keeps you asking for more.. Cos sometimes when he's pissed he says the most logical things... He's extreme...&nbsp;OH.. And he likes to flex his arms and brag about his arms getting bigger... "Mess with the best, die like the rest"&nbsp; .... "Woman!! Speak only when spoken to!!" are some of his favourite phrases... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Iskandar</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">Known for 5-6 years. Friends for 3-4 years.</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">Always showing the fuck face in secondary school. Never looked approachable to me..&nbsp;When I&nbsp;first got to know his existance.. I never liked him. He looked arrogant, and he kept looking as if we all owed him something... I never really got any chance to talk to him in school. But somehow by a twist of fate or by destiny. We became friends through Harris. During poly life, I started to hang out with them. And at first I was shocked at how Iskandar can actually talk like a normal person. To me, it was almost similar to seeing an alien speak english. But we got used to seeing each other during lepak sessions and soon enough became friends. Somehow we started talking about his need to find a girlfriend. And how he's alate bloomer and how he wants to be a player. The thigs i told him about girls, countless! Like I gave him a full advance course on the different types of girls there are and how to handle some kind of girls. Sometimes during lepak sessions they will just bombard me with countless questions about girls. Like i was their teacher on how the girls mind works. And they would tell me their experiences and stories. Then they would expect me to decipher for them, why the girl was like that. What was hse thinking? How should they have replied? Did they do the right thing? And then now? Now, Isk went through dating quite a few girls. He worked out and made his body bulkier. And he pees alot in public.. And he likes to take off his shirt.. And he likes to show off his abs... He asks for lots of advice. He's like the boy that wants to learn every single thing there is to learn... But he doesnt realise sometimes that there's no right or wrong.. Sometimes he comes across to me as if he's afraid.. He's afraid that 1 wrong decision&nbsp;now will ruin the rest of his life... Sometimes he over thinks things... He over evaluates and he thinks too much into small issues... He likes to play it safe.. Sometimes, too safe... He;s wants to make everything perfect. He wants it like in the books or in theory where you do one thing and there's only a few possibility of things happening. He forgets that human are full of surprises. That there is no 1 route that will bring you to 1 destination... He appreciates. And he shows it. And whenever he gets the chance to be there for you. He steps up and tries his best to be there... He's observant. He observes. And he tries to decipher his observations. He wants to get every explanation possible for everything he sees. Sometimes, you run out of words on how to explain to him. But you keep trying because you see how eager he is to learn about girls, and life, and love and such. He's always asking.... And he absorbs... I think he knows more than he thinks he knows. He just doesnt know how to execute it, and he's seldom sure about something... Just like all of us.. OH! And he does really embarrassing things at times. Like shitting at a park.. And he's proud of&nbsp;it... It's known as "marking his territory"... &nbsp;=) </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Danny</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">Known for 5-6 years. Friends for 3-4 years.</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">In secondary school, a lot of girls were going goo goo gaga over him. I became a victim of that goooo gaga-ness for awhile. He was just this cool indian guy with piercing intense eyes that seem to see right through you. We talked abit. But he never did show any interest. And I believe we did exchange a few messages here and there. He never really talked much in school. Was always in the group of guy friends together with Isk and Praba and all.. I always tried to impress him in my own silly and awkward way. But never worked. So, similarly to Isk, I got introduced to him during the leapk sessions. And he took a longer time to get used to me being in their group. Never talked much. He listened alot. But not much input whenever I'm around. I was nervous at the start cos I was afraid he still thinks I like him. At that time, I've gone through tons of guys. So I wasnt really young and naive anymore. And somehow I kept trying to show him again, in my silly little ways that I only want to be friends with him. Even though it's not necessary cos to him, we're all members. Danny is loyal. He's the kind like in the mafia. Family is family... Members is members.. And he follows those unwritten laws of brotherhood closely. IF you even give slight hint that he has in any way breach the code of brotherhood, he will step up and like a police officer reading you the laws you've broken. He will say "Brothers dont check out brother's girl..." And he'll say it with a serious face. He complains, and he likes to joke in his own silly way. Sometimes he does funny and stupid things and say things that make it seem as if he didnt use his brains. No matter how much of a man he put himself to be, he still gets caught in embarrassing moments. But the thing about him is, he lets you laugh at him. He doesnt stop you from laughing. He'll just say "funny meh? why you laughing til lidat?" .. But he'll let you laugh.. And most of the time I'm the one that laugh the loudest cos it's nice to see him embarrassed. Makes him that much more human. When I first got to know him, he came across as emotion-less. To him, it's called "Being a Man" ... But now, he's more opened up.. And he's more fun... He talks more, jokes more, shares more... And there were a few precious moments I swear I felt his emotions... He's loyal to his friendship with all of us. But he likes to disturb Isk the most. Maybe cos Isk is the only one that won't fight back... But I always interpret it as "they're gay partners"... Sometimes, Danny acts like a little boy. He doesnt know how to express his emotions. Or maybe it's cos he DOESN'T want to. Whatever it is... He doesnt know what an EGG TART is.. He has a super hairy leg. Which he has tried to trim but to no avail. And he gets into trouble in NS for stupid little things. But he wants to be an officer... I have the feeling its not just because of the pay... I think it's because being officer just makes him that much more manly... haha... His guard is seldom down whenever there are girls around.. He has to live up to the cool looking indian image... =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Logen</span></u></strong><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">Acquainted since Secondary 1, became close friends almost immediately ... Til now...</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;">Distance does not affect our friendship. We can not speak or meet up for months on end, but when we do it's like we just picked up from where we left off. We always know when the other party isnt feeling too well, or the other person is going through a tough time. And we go straight to the point. Fuck happy thoughts fuck trying to pretend to be strong, we just let out all the emotions when we see each other. With him, it doesnt feel so wrong to be sad and pathetic. As much as I want him to be happy. But somehow I feel that sadness and problems, works well with him. He has a way of putting things to you so you see it in a different light. And you're not afraid to tell him truthfully what shit you've been through in your life. He never seem to judge you. He has the most contagious laughter I've ever heard from anyone. He laughs loud, farts loud, yawns loud, and he laughter can continue on and on and on... Til everyone in the room is laughing along with him. Some people thingks he's weird. That he's loud yet he's a little conservative... He's loud, yet he seems to sometimes keep to himself. But he like a bottle. Filled to the rim. If he doesnt cap himself, he'll spill. And he's not one that wants to spill... He only uncaps himself with people he trusts... And not many people he trusts with his biggest secrets... He likes to club... He can dance all night and go mad.. But when he clubs, its the only time&nbsp;I see him smile so wide, without any jokes or stupid things to laugh about... =) &nbsp;He genuinely seem to enjoy clubbing. He taught me how to shuffle. Even though I'm stil a noob at it. He taught me the basics... He always willing to teach and share what he knows... He likes and is learning the art of Aikido. He tried a few moves on Harris and I. It was cool... =) Logen's like a long distance brother.. We seldom meet. Maybe it's how this friendship is suppose to be... But for everything, I've appreciated him alot. Through secondary school. He was one of the best friends... Even til now... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><u><span style="color: black;">Azim</span></u></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>Known him from Poly. Friends for 3-4 years...</strong> </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Understanding. Mature... ABANG LONG... HAHA. He alwys willing to help. He likes to joke. And he laughs at your jokes...Maybe the only reason why it was easy being friends with him cos he laughs at my jokes.. =) And I like people who appreciates my jokes and my effort to make other laugh. As Poly days passed on, I went to school lesser and lesser. But in 3rd year. We made a pack, that we would both try to motivate each other to come to school. And even though that determination to do better in school together didnt last long. We got closer and we became school buds... We disturbed each other. We told each other who we think was hott and we shared dirty secrets about porn stars and poked fun of each other.. He's cool headed. I don't think I've ever seen him really pissed. He just brushes off&nbsp; lots of things by saying it's lame and he doesnt want to be any part of it.&nbsp;A little bit like Harris in that sense. The first guy friend from Poly that I brought and introduced to my Secondary school friends. No regrets on that cos eventually he became Yeni's boyfriend. He's sociable. He's friendly. He doesnt come across and weird in any way... He's relax and he's okay with lepaking with people he hardly knows. And he's done some really silly things as well. But I shall not expose him here as it was a promise. He has a god-sister. And that story alone is silly enough.. =)&nbsp;He laughs whenever&nbsp;I try to speak chinese. He forgives. He's patient...&nbsp;He seldom shares his problems. But he shares his experiences... He tries his best not to make you feel left out, if you're a friend he truly appreciates... Sometimes he goes crazy and do funny and crazy things to make you laugh.. Thats AZIMAT.. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">___________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><em><span style="color: black;">The more I find out about thes people I have mentioned... The more I start to care and give a shit about them... And they're always able to cheer me up.. And whenever I hang out with them... No matter how sad and pathetic I feel, I try my best to stay happy... Cos I see them happier when I'm happy. And I'm happier when I see them happier. And when they're hurt and they cry or they whine or they complain. Somehow I feel the same kind of pain for them. And I wish bad things to go away for them. </span></em><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">___________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-size: x-large;"><strong>OKAY! I AM DONE FOR THE DAY !!! =) GOODIE BYE !!!</strong></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8121307068134809209?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-54707296389537104452010-08-27T09:54:00.000+08:002010-08-27T09:54:08.821+08:00<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">IM HAPPY!!! IT'S A FUCKING FRIDAY AND <span style="font-size: small;">TOMORROW NO WORK!!! WOOHOOO!!!! </span></span></strong></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcXMkN_1kI/AAAAAAAABCc/gS7NpEccqlA/s1600/tumblr_l6rtrkBViH1qd0e8lo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="236" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcXMkN_1kI/AAAAAAAABCc/gS7NpEccqlA/s400/tumblr_l6rtrkBViH1qd0e8lo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: black;"><strong><span style="font-size: large;">PICTURES OF KOREAN F4,&nbsp;KIM HYUN JOONG &amp; LEE MIN HO</span></strong> </span></div><br /><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ2U1XRPI/AAAAAAAABA0/-QulOmvxwL8/s1600/3256459305_9838a6076b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="243" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ2U1XRPI/AAAAAAAABA0/-QulOmvxwL8/s400/3256459305_9838a6076b.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">THE KOREAN F4 GANG ...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ6rXjviI/AAAAAAAABBE/HD34g0_0IEI/s1600/boys_over_flower.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="295" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ6rXjviI/AAAAAAAABBE/HD34g0_0IEI/s400/boys_over_flower.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">GUESS WHO'S MY FAVOURITE?? =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ0jyjNeI/AAAAAAAABAs/NJ1o8FVdR_U/s1600/64ad71b3034020_full.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="212" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ0jyjNeI/AAAAAAAABAs/NJ1o8FVdR_U/s400/64ad71b3034020_full.png" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">How come they look like Prince Charming with so much easeeeee?</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRXeS1KII/AAAAAAAABB0/gTLl4yAncw8/s1600/lee-min-ho-90125013.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRXeS1KII/AAAAAAAABB0/gTLl4yAncw8/s400/lee-min-ho-90125013.jpg" width="267" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LEE MIN HO....</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">How can anyone ot melt with that smile/smirk?</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ4sodhGI/AAAAAAAABA8/bWUUOdk7FVI/s1600/20090608200640.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ4sodhGI/AAAAAAAABA8/bWUUOdk7FVI/s400/20090608200640.jpg" width="263" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">hais... im getting greedy here...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Even my fantasies are getting bigger, better and further from reality.. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRGlueJ3I/AAAAAAAABBk/5avD5ODTeco/s1600/korea-lee-min-ho-004.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRGlueJ3I/AAAAAAAABBk/5avD5ODTeco/s400/korea-lee-min-ho-004.jpg" width="267" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">HOW? HOW?? TELL ME HOWW???</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">To resist this kind of face and body?</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRioe2gQI/AAAAAAAABCE/sQMi9NwPjkc/s1600/Lee-min-ho-lee-min-ho-5564557-1024-768.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRioe2gQI/AAAAAAAABCE/sQMi9NwPjkc/s400/Lee-min-ho-lee-min-ho-5564557-1024-768.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LUST, is a dangerous affection...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRJmJRE6I/AAAAAAAABBs/Z6y53L4iDTs/s1600/lee95min45ho-200907050403382.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRJmJRE6I/AAAAAAAABBs/Z6y53L4iDTs/s400/lee95min45ho-200907050403382.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Just 25 episodes...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I had an affair with Lee Min Ho for 25 episodes... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LOL...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ_ZEDGYI/AAAAAAAABBM/COZTULgwQv4/s1600/Kim_hyun_joong(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcQ_ZEDGYI/AAAAAAAABBM/COZTULgwQv4/s400/Kim_hyun_joong(2).jpg" width="301" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">NEXT FAVOURITE!! </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">KIM HYUN JOONG...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRFwGDJGI/AAAAAAAABBc/6ByI6aT7010/s1600/Kim_Hyun_Joong_(3).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRFwGDJGI/AAAAAAAABBc/6ByI6aT7010/s400/Kim_Hyun_Joong_(3).jpg" width="313" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Emo style suits him well..</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But wait till you see his pretty smile... =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRldaz56I/AAAAAAAABCM/mbJlpLqB-tQ/s1600/untitled1.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRldaz56I/AAAAAAAABCM/mbJlpLqB-tQ/s400/untitled1.bmp" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">OMFG right?? =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRFQg7REI/AAAAAAAABBU/uZYtzOD6fxM/s1600/kim_hyun_joong_01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRFQg7REI/AAAAAAAABBU/uZYtzOD6fxM/s400/kim_hyun_joong_01.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I want to be the clothes he wears on everyday/night...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">I had a scandal with him for the same 25 episodes i had an affair with his co-star..</span></div><div align="center"><br /></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;"><strong>PUT THEM TOGETHER????</strong> </span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRgh-0BKI/AAAAAAAABB8/ruRwpC17m6Q/s1600/leeminho_comeback.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="221" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcRgh-0BKI/AAAAAAAABB8/ruRwpC17m6Q/s400/leeminho_comeback.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And you get my current best fantasy EVER!!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">If i imagine anymore.. I'll prolly be in <em>INCEPTION.</em> </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">_________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>OKAY OKAY!!!</strong> I admit... I am a little bit bias... If I hadnt watch the dramna series. I would admit and say with lots of pride that these pictures and the people being portrayed in the pictures? <strong>ARE GAY.</strong> But!! I&nbsp;<strong>am</strong> bias... And i am going to say with lots of pride and ego that FUCK YOU! These guys will fuck me in my dreams... My fantasy land has endless episodes.... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Talking about fantasies.. I wonder... If i start blogging about my fantasies.. Would you guys like to read it? LOL.. Would it even be normal? LOL. Of course i will downplay the explicit contents. But... LOL. I think it's better to keep my fantasies to myself... Makes it just that much more special when i conjure up Lee Min Ho and Kim Hyun Joong. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcXJi3u_bI/AAAAAAAABCU/Vt3FZmEdw0U/s1600/tumblr_l6uv0v5Q5P1qzr04eo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="372" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/THcXJi3u_bI/AAAAAAAABCU/Vt3FZmEdw0U/s400/tumblr_l6uv0v5Q5P1qzr04eo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I would love to tell you that its not lust, its love... LOL. But i would then be lying. And i hate lying to people i love... SOOOOO... I am lusting for them... If i could just have 30 minutes of fun with them naked, or at least half naked... My life would almost be complete... How then, would it be complete you ask?? =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If both of them, at the same moment that i feel lonely and downright pathetic.. Came into my life and both wanted to be the love of my life... And that they both will stay by my side forever til i die... =) </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;"><strong>YES!!!! I AM EXAGGERATING!!! THIS IS WHAT STUPID GIRLS DO!!!</strong></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;"><strong>WE EXAGGERATE!! =)</strong></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Even the love we think we feel for our boyf(s), we exaggerate!! That's why guys think we're so in love and willing to die and cry for them... WRONG!!! We just tend to eaggerate our emotions... Our bodies are like the projector for our heart... Whatever you see us say and do? Is 100 times of what our heart really feels... Sometimes we exaggerate so well, that even we start to believe the exaggeration...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Thats why our emotions are all over the place... =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">__________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><strong><span style="color: #660000;">OH YEAH BABEH!!! 2 more fucking days!! And ... NEW JOB HERE I FUCKING COME!!!</span></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I made a mistake in my medical check up... I told the doctor i drink... And smoke...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And that fucking doctor... WROTE IT DOWN!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And he asked how often i drink.. I couldnt think of an answer and he just kept asking so i said "every 1-2 months"</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">And he gave me the look... =(&nbsp;&nbsp; The look that shoots right through you... And then he asked me about smoking.. And i said "Averagely about 3-5 sticks a day.. " </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Then that fucking doctor gave me the look, like he didnt believe me... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">FUCKING doctor made me nervous... Im seldom nervous with doctors. But this doctor saw right through me... And he said "So every once in 2 months you go on a binge for alcohol??"</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">I said "Ermm.... not really..." And laughed my most awkward laugh... And he just gave me the one eyebrow up kind of look again... =( Fuck.... I hope the report does not show this... =( I regret being honest... FUCK... FML....</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">_______________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">K. Too much words... =) CHEEEEEE- BYE!!!!!! =)</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-5470729638953710445?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-86140917889138590562010-08-26T17:33:00.001+08:002010-08-26T17:40:18.515+08:00<div align="center"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/2TOAjoLw0aQ?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/2TOAjoLw0aQ?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;">WHO?? Who the fuck would love me for me? </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Even I don't like myself most of the time...</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Who will stick with me through my best and my worst? </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">If i don't believe in love... Can believe in soul mates?</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Is it the same? Fuck i wish i knew...</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Why csnt i just have one person. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">ONE person!!!!!</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">My fucking soulmate... </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Maybe my soulmate is a pig... </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Nobody said soul mates must be human what.... =\</span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Got more to blog... But too</span><span style="color: black;"> much words for today already... And it's almost knock of time... </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Gonna blog more about the korean shits tmr. Cos i got pictures to show you.. =)</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">TATA SAUCE!!!! =D</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">_______________________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;">_______________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;">___________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;">________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;">_________</span><br /><span style="color: black;">___</span></div></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-8614091788913859056?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-18329399481669524502010-08-26T12:50:00.001+08:002010-08-26T12:55:24.579+08:00<span style="color: black;">WOW ... </span><span style="color: black;">Spent the whole week watching <em><strong>"BOYS OVER FLOWERS"</strong></em> ... The korean adaptation of the taiwan <em>"Meteor Garden"</em> ....</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">ONE WORD : AWE-FUCKING-SOME!!!!</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">My mum laughs at me now. Says im crazier than her. I bought the whole set of the show. Just so that i dont have to wait for it to buffer if i watch it online.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Bought another set of series too. <em>"ACCIDENTAL COUPLE".</em> </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">In my defence, it was on offer. TWO sets for S$25 ... Worth it? LOL.... I wanted to buy another series but it was expensive. Sigh.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I guess, why i watch Korean Drama Series, and why i fall in love with watching them, and is totally fucking addicted to it now is because. That's the closest thing i can feel to love. As in, LOVE, like boy-girl kind of love. When i watched <em>"Boys Over Flowers",</em> I felt alive (HAHA!)... Like as if i was so full of love and ready to spread it. But then i find out that i dont have anywhere i want to spread that love to...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i realise that, in reality. Korean drama situations don't happen. I mean, what are the chances that a super rich dude, born with a gold spoon down his throat, is a total jerk off, bumps into me and suddenly falls in love with me? What are the chances that with my looks and personality, TWO fucking rich kids fall in love with me and without me initiating anything they realise they cannot live without me? LOL. And what are the chances that .... y'know? You get what i mean? I guess girls are stupid in that way... We believe too much in fairytales and happy endings.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Im bent on changing that perspective of me. I don't want to believe in such things as "THE ONE", "PRINCE CHARMING", "FATE", "DESTINY", "LOVE".... I don't want because, it has disappointed me way too many times. Just cant trust my life with them.... These fantasies screws with out minds. Makes us believe that reality is not real and does not have to be real. It's lame. Cos life is full of shit....</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I see married couples everyday. Or no... I <strong>KNOW</strong> married couples... Let me share some examples of why true love does not exist.....</span><br /><br /><span style="color: #990000;">1) Guy &amp; Girl (Married)</span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Guy fucks around. </span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl pretends not to know.</span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy knows Girl knows.</span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Guy pretends not to know.</span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; People think they are happily married with kids.</span><br /><span style="color: #990000;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; They know better.</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><br /><span style="color: #073763;">2) Guy&nbsp;&amp; Girl (Married)</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy does not love Girl.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl loves Guy and cannot let go.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy feels like shit.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy falls in love with another girl.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl suspects but tightens grip on Guy.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy realise cannot even try to love her anymore.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; But Guy stays with her due to circumstances.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl thinks Guy still loves her.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; But Guy meets lover outside whenever he can.</span><br /><span style="color: #073763;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Married? Happy? Fuck you...</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: purple;">3) Guy &amp; Girl (Married)</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy loves girl.</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl loves guy.</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Guy also love GIRLSSSS...</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy know Girl is understanding.</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; So Guy fucks girlsssssss...</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Girl doesnt mind...</span><br /><span style="color: purple;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; OH... TRUE LOVE... <strike><span style="font-size: xx-small;">You're a whore...</span></strike></span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">4) Guy &amp; Girl (In relationship)</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl loves Guy.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Girl screws up.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Guy also screws up.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Break up.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Get back together.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Cant forget the past.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Fight, Quarrel, Resent.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Break up.</span><br /><span style="color: #38761d;">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Love ... But Hate.... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>SEE!!!</strong>&nbsp; It's true... Love does not exist. </span></span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I think everyone just chooses to believe its love. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos love has been too commercialized.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">People think love is great, its awesome, its to die for.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think maybe love isnt that great at all...</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Just good marketing skills.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Love is like religion.. We believe in them.. Have faith in them... </span><br /><span style="color: black;">But sometimes, they fuck us over.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And they seperates us from reality.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Make us believe in so many things that contradicts.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then tell us that its our fault that it screwed up.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Cos we "mis-interpreted" the holy whatever nonsense.</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Then tell us that its just a test. A test of FAITH.</span><br /><strong><span style="color: #990000;">OMG. LOVE IS A FUCKING RELIGION!</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><strike>Love is like a god...</strike> That i refuse to believe in...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Oh yah... And and and....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think people who dump people to go back to ex(s) ... ARE FUCKED UP!!!</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Not that i'm saying people who dump people for other people is not....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And not that im sayimg I'M not....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">And i'm not saying someone dumped me. </span><br /><span style="color: black;">I was never taken anyway... But yeah....</span><br /><span style="color: black;">Fuck ex(s)...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">New job soon... Cant wait... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>KAYBAAAAAAIISSSSS~!!</strong></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1832939948166952450?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-26346543880828579132010-08-22T15:51:00.000+08:002010-08-22T15:51:34.950+08:00<strong><span style="color: black;">THANKS TO MY MUM AND MY AUNTY&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ..... ..... .... .... ....</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">I AM NOW OFFICIALLY ADDICTED TO KOREAN DRAMAS.</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strike><span style="color: black;">FUUUUCCCCKKKK!!!! I do not like this new revelation.... KNN....</span></strike><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I mean, i love korean dramas now. Like <strong>LUUUUURVE</strong>.....~~~</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I don't know. It's cute. The kind of love they share in those shows. It's always the same story line. But it's nice. To love. And sometimes when they cry because things dont go their way. You kind of wanna cry along. Cos sometimes, love is really like that. Dramatic, stupid, useless, hopeless, full of shit, but then... Full of surprises, sweet endings and twists, beautiful moments that even though to outsiders may seem stupid, but will always be engraved in your memory....</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Korean drama makes me think back on all the <em>"so-called love"</em> that i've been through. </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">And its bad because, Korean drama serials, makes me... Yearn to be loved again... For someone to fall so deeply in love with me.... And for me to&nbsp;fall so deeply in love with that person at the exact same time and with the perfect moment.... Makes me want to feel that kind of love again.... Even though i know good things never lasts.... =\</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">____________________________________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">That aside...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I watched <strong><em>FULL HOUSE</em></strong>.... Supposedly an old korean drama show. <strong>RAIN</strong> was the lead actor. And after watching the show. I changed my perspective of him. I mean, he's kinda a good actor lah. Or at least, in the show he's slightly cuter than those posters of his.... Never liked him.. Maybe cos im prejudice against the name. Like "APPLE", I don't like people who name themselves after things... =\ Unless given by the parents... HAHA....</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">So,<em> Full House</em> was nice. Laughed, Cried, Got Excited, Hated, Loved, Felt .... The whole 16 episodes... I&nbsp;finished within&nbsp;24 hours....&nbsp;With an intermittent sleep of about 5 hours...</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I'm also in the midst of watching <em><strong>"Will it snow in christmas?" </strong></em></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">But after watching <em>FULL HOUSE</em>. I think, <em>Will It Snow In Christmas</em> wont be as good... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">AND I WANT A KOREAN BOYF~~~!!! A HOTT KOREAN BOYF!!!! =D</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black; font-size: xx-small;">I know... Since i broke up, i've been saying i want alot of different kinds of dicks and pusssies... WELL, =)&nbsp; No harm right? Plus I wanna test drive&nbsp;a korean guy... =) Wouldn't mind a korean girl too... ;)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">_____________________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/-qZdwPMlmNQ?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/-qZdwPMlmNQ?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/3HZwrF1Fxw4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/3HZwrF1Fxw4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">___________________________________________</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">OKAY!!! Weekends burned.... Tuesday MC.... =) Wednesday unpaid leave... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">NEXT WEEK ONLY WORK&nbsp; 3.5 DAYS!! YAY!!! WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><strong><span style="color: black;">___________________________________________</span></strong><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I miss my friends... =)&nbsp; And i miss someone hugging me to sleep... =)</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I think tryimg so hard to love someone and waiting... Was so tiring, that it took away all my feelings.... I want to like someone... Not just a "oh, he's hott... lets fuck that" kind of like... I want to really like someone, for their character, for their personality, and because they make me feel special....</span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">I want... to be.... able.... to feel..... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Sigh.... </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Please dont misunderstand guys. Im happy. I really am.. Korean drama makes me happy now. I just thought i'd share with you that... At times, i feel lonely too... =) So whoever you guys are, reading this and wondering where the fuck you went wrong with life? You're not alone... =) </span><br /><span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br /><span style="color: black;">Awwwright.. Bye.... </span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-2634654388082857913?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-65431874043118525662010-08-19T16:20:00.000+08:002010-08-19T16:20:14.997+08:00<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">HELLO GUYS. TODAY IS <strong>RANDOM PICTURES TAKEN FROM MY PHONE</strong> POST!! =)</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I think some pictures are being re-posted but fuck it. Nice pictures that captures happy memories. So i shall post them all!! =) I took a long time to bluetooth them over to my company laptop. So.. Please do enjoy!! ;)</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">STAAAARTS!!! =D</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">_________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">FAMILY</span></strong></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy1vlAJjxI/AAAAAAAAA6s/-lZ7Z7x7vBU/s1600/SNC00452.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy1vlAJjxI/AAAAAAAAA6s/-lZ7Z7x7vBU/s400/SNC00452.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My grandmother on the far left. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Looks exactly like my mum doesnt she? =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5nCbghCI/AAAAAAAAA-s/CZ0cWvmI3MU/s1600/SNC00953.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5nCbghCI/AAAAAAAAA-s/CZ0cWvmI3MU/s400/SNC00953.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Aunty on the far right. Mum's older sister.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My mum's sooo gonna look like my gramma when she's old. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I always tease her about it. HAHA</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Ogn05fI/AAAAAAAAA_U/T7zBR0clGwg/s1600/SNC00988.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Ogn05fI/AAAAAAAAA_U/T7zBR0clGwg/s400/SNC00988.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">See!! SAME FACE!! </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Just with different years of experience written on their faces. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5fztmo6I/AAAAAAAAA-k/BllQJWJPCfM/s1600/SNC00945.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5fztmo6I/AAAAAAAAA-k/BllQJWJPCfM/s400/SNC00945.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Mother's day treat from my brother and i,</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">At Hog's Breath.</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5usfRX8I/AAAAAAAAA-0/KctbgxKjl_k/s1600/SNC00956.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5usfRX8I/AAAAAAAAA-0/KctbgxKjl_k/s320/SNC00956.jpg" width="298" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This story is hilarious. You cant see it.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But bryan sucked on his water bottle hard and looong.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And his whole lips became swollen for about an hour or so.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">He cried when we told him how stupid it was and how my dad will be so mad.</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy1mPyR8qI/AAAAAAAAA6k/_l6lKrDTB2I/s1600/SNC00204.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy1mPyR8qI/AAAAAAAAA6k/_l6lKrDTB2I/s400/SNC00204.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Again, the little bugger. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Now wearing jewellery from Forever 21 when we were shopping.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5KIAWyWI/AAAAAAAAA-M/jvk4G0MYcQw/s1600/SNC00930.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5KIAWyWI/AAAAAAAAA-M/jvk4G0MYcQw/s400/SNC00930.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I love this picture. Makes Bryan and I look angelic. =)</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Pictures can be decieving...</span></div><div align="center"><span style="color: black;">Im the only anglic one... ;) HAHA</span></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">________________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">VEEEGEEEEZZZ/AWESOME TRIOS (MIX)</span></strong></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy14znowYI/AAAAAAAAA60/ERTNxCaBRw8/s1600/SNC00512.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy14znowYI/AAAAAAAAA60/ERTNxCaBRw8/s400/SNC00512.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">THE VEEEGEEEZ... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">After karaoke session at cashstudio, i think..</span></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2ydfHntI/AAAAAAAAA7s/zLIqBDomHOI/s1600/SNC00675.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2ydfHntI/AAAAAAAAA7s/zLIqBDomHOI/s400/SNC00675.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">US again, on my birthday.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">At some seesha place i forgot the name (arab street)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy26E8hNfI/AAAAAAAAA70/vf6YvnKzm84/s1600/SNC00689.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy26E8hNfI/AAAAAAAAA70/vf6YvnKzm84/s400/SNC00689.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Them giving me my birthday hug during my wish. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Yv7cvKI/AAAAAAAAA_c/_JbTTAHwJ3A/s1600/SNC01000.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Yv7cvKI/AAAAAAAAA_c/_JbTTAHwJ3A/s400/SNC01000.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">FATEHA DRIVING!! LOL.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Dangerous roads nows adays.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Cos alls the girls are ons the roads nows. =D</span></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4WBOa7pI/AAAAAAAAA9U/6GLrsI6LtDU/s1600/SNC00886.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4WBOa7pI/AAAAAAAAA9U/6GLrsI6LtDU/s400/SNC00886.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Think we meant to go eat Tulang before this picture was taken.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Changed our minds. And Haidar got a cigarette fine that day.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5RFHtmII/AAAAAAAAA-U/zGb5l0mfgD0/s1600/SNC00939.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5RFHtmII/AAAAAAAAA-U/zGb5l0mfgD0/s320/SNC00939.jpg" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">DURIANS!! </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">At Lorong 8, under Allen's Block.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Enjooooy...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5YiLKexI/AAAAAAAAA-c/cANoYjKdXv8/s1600/SNC00942.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5YiLKexI/AAAAAAAAA-c/cANoYjKdXv8/s400/SNC00942.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Durian was gooooood~</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">While we were eating durian... </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They were disturbing me about being under Allen's block.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Then sooo fucking coincidentally...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They saw a black swift...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I thought they were kidding.. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They werent...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I was THIS close to running or shouting.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But i just hid my face.. Felt nervous.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Pretend nothing happened. LOL.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy44OkvTdI/AAAAAAAAA90/YyBtmi6eABw/s1600/SNC00917.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy44OkvTdI/AAAAAAAAA90/YyBtmi6eABw/s400/SNC00917.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So one night, Fateha, Aryani, Azim and I were bored.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Lepaked under Fateha's block. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Had Black Henna tattoos with us.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Decided to act gangster.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5AuHTUPI/AAAAAAAAA98/gw9h-2QR2rg/s1600/SNC00921.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5AuHTUPI/AAAAAAAAA98/gw9h-2QR2rg/s400/SNC00921.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">GANGSTER HORRR????</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4lzFm-VI/AAAAAAAAA9k/HOU06f922eo/s1600/SNC00897.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4lzFm-VI/AAAAAAAAA9k/HOU06f922eo/s400/SNC00897.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My mum's name on my left arm.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4vuRAkQI/AAAAAAAAA9s/wN2hdHAXxNQ/s1600/SNC00899.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4vuRAkQI/AAAAAAAAA9s/wN2hdHAXxNQ/s400/SNC00899.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My dad's name on my right.</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5IfuAO5I/AAAAAAAAA-E/2MaWhWM4xUw/s1600/SNC00925.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5IfuAO5I/AAAAAAAAA-E/2MaWhWM4xUw/s400/SNC00925.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My siblings names on my thighs... =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We were so fucking high with henna-ing. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Everyone had tattoos.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I was fucking gangster.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Don't fuck with me. &gt;)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">___________________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">THE GUYS</span></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My name for them? LEPAKings...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2KuFAPKI/AAAAAAAAA7E/pcJ5rOCbMeU/s1600/SNC00600.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2KuFAPKI/AAAAAAAAA7E/pcJ5rOCbMeU/s400/SNC00600.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">One&nbsp;evening while lepaking..</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Someone(danny/isk/TK) decided we should take a "family photo"</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Never had that thought, or never had anyone of them volunteered to take a photo before.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">So, the plan was carried out.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">It was fun. Pictures and all.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">For the first time EVERYONE smiled for the camera. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2T4CBUAI/AAAAAAAAA7M/MV_3qegS6dQ/s1600/SNC00603.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2T4CBUAI/AAAAAAAAA7M/MV_3qegS6dQ/s400/SNC00603.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">As you can see i was very happy when this photos were taken.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This are the guys that make me really happy even when we're doing nothing. =)</span></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2cCCK_1I/AAAAAAAAA7U/H-1z8nCletY/s1600/SNC00604.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2cCCK_1I/AAAAAAAAA7U/H-1z8nCletY/s400/SNC00604.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Isk is a little out of place here.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">But he always was cos he has his shirt off.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">His trademark, by the way. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2Ak0c5aI/AAAAAAAAA68/0PvGwwGijUg/s1600/SNC00591.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2Ak0c5aI/AAAAAAAAA68/0PvGwwGijUg/s400/SNC00591.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">The times when all of us smoked different cigarettes.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Cigarettes are essential when lepaking. </span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3QxsOevI/AAAAAAAAA8M/UFHvmkgFFRo/s1600/SNC00712.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3QxsOevI/AAAAAAAAA8M/UFHvmkgFFRo/s400/SNC00712.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My birthday dinner wih them bunch. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3JYecGiI/AAAAAAAAA8E/4quzDFeRxVw/s1600/SNC00708.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3JYecGiI/AAAAAAAAA8E/4quzDFeRxVw/s400/SNC00708.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Danny is the hardest person to take a normal good smiling picture with.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Sometimes i get the impression that he thinks taking pictures is LAME.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">=) But he's a good boy most of the time. HAHA!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3BxFgLPI/AAAAAAAAA78/10xHs7W58S4/s1600/SNC00706.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3BxFgLPI/AAAAAAAAA78/10xHs7W58S4/s400/SNC00706.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Isk loves taking pictures. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Especially with his shirt off. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LOL.</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3YUILw2I/AAAAAAAAA8U/NTdMT0MdVws/s1600/SNC00722.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3YUILw2I/AAAAAAAAA8U/NTdMT0MdVws/s400/SNC00722.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This is a bit of what we drank after dinner, on my birthday eve...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Which i wil never forget because most of us got so drunk we couldnt remember details.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We only remember cos it was the most exciting, most mind blasting clelebration ever.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They sang a bdaysong for me... *smiles wide*</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3gXYRHcI/AAAAAAAAA8c/FZKoNQ45ffs/s1600/SNC00730.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3gXYRHcI/AAAAAAAAA8c/FZKoNQ45ffs/s400/SNC00730.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This was the scene where they sang my bday song at 12am on&nbsp;24.3.2010</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Best group of guy friends ever. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Only group of guy friends i acknowledge as a group of guy friends.. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4OTIQdiI/AAAAAAAAA9M/Sd03f7LS1p8/s1600/SNC00849.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4OTIQdiI/AAAAAAAAA9M/Sd03f7LS1p8/s320/SNC00849.jpg" width="298" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">The cake.cookie thingy that i made for Isk on his birthday..</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They say it taste like Famous Amos soft cookie.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They hesitated to eat it. But after the first taste,</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">They were asking for more!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">IM AWESOME.. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6n-VNiGI/AAAAAAAAA_s/lxKk8Hw8tD8/s1600/SNC01011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6n-VNiGI/AAAAAAAAA_s/lxKk8Hw8tD8/s400/SNC01011.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This was taken very recently after my jog with Danny.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We went to Harris house and played drinking games.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Loser drank this.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">It has cookie, beer, chilli sauce, garlic chilli,H-Two-O, and stuff in it...</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Gues who lost???</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6ut0xxtI/AAAAAAAAA_0/_cducnoa84o/s1600/SNC01013.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6ut0xxtI/AAAAAAAAA_0/_cducnoa84o/s400/SNC01013.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">ME... But i made them drink some... =D</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">_______________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">LOGEN</span></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Always the smae kind of friend no matter how long and far apart we've been from each other.. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4HCV_l4I/AAAAAAAAA9E/XivHeF2sId0/s1600/SNC00846.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4HCV_l4I/AAAAAAAAA9E/XivHeF2sId0/s320/SNC00846.jpg" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">After Isk bday KAraoke session at GrandLink.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Logen adn i went up to eat.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">He heard music from the Thai Disco nearby.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Wanted to go in.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">No guts. LOL</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">______________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">SAM </span></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">(My birthday treat)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2j5pvS2I/AAAAAAAAA7c/wE9lb_wWYtk/s1600/SNC00624.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2j5pvS2I/AAAAAAAAA7c/wE9lb_wWYtk/s400/SNC00624.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Treated me to Ichiban Sushi. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Had a heartful meal. Was happy. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">THANKS SAM!! =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2qxxFAuI/AAAAAAAAA7k/1gjDR14L1ig/s1600/SNC00627.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="320" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy2qxxFAuI/AAAAAAAAA7k/1gjDR14L1ig/s320/SNC00627.jpg" width="298" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I think we ate alot...</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Now i feel like eating ichiban sushi again... =(</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3qlRduII/AAAAAAAAA8k/HrOJEQiB_20/s1600/SNC00814.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3qlRduII/AAAAAAAAA8k/HrOJEQiB_20/s400/SNC00814.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Went to Ipoh.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Sam was my host. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Drinking everynight.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Beer became my best friend again that trip. =)</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3zBMjibI/AAAAAAAAA8s/0vlk8fojdiQ/s1600/SNC00816.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy3zBMjibI/AAAAAAAAA8s/0vlk8fojdiQ/s400/SNC00816.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I made love to beer... =) </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">HAHA! Ipoh was relaxing.. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Purely drinking and doing nth much trip.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LOVED IT. KINDA MISS IT.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">_________________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">Vanessa (My baby)</span></strong></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzZFxmirsI/AAAAAAAABAM/bjP8q-B0k9A/s1600/SNC00232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzZFxmirsI/AAAAAAAABAM/bjP8q-B0k9A/s400/SNC00232.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We do fleas together.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We bitch about shit together.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">We remind each other why we like and hate about our partners/life.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">She's Smart. Logical. Fierce. Stubborn. </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Generally very nice, if you dont step on her toes. =)</span></div><br /><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy52TMXJGI/AAAAAAAAA-8/I_yy7o7aGuU/s1600/SNC00958.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy52TMXJGI/AAAAAAAAA-8/I_yy7o7aGuU/s400/SNC00958.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">She got me POSH brownies ..</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LOVE POSH BROWNIES!!! </span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">CRAVIIINGSSS again... =(</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">_____________________________________</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: black;">ME &amp; RANDOM PICS</span></strong></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4AW_pGrI/AAAAAAAAA88/8emA1-0VxRs/s1600/SNC00836.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy4AW_pGrI/AAAAAAAAA88/8emA1-0VxRs/s400/SNC00836.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">When i made Isk cake/cookie thingy.</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I had extra batter. So i made two.</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">This one's for family. =)</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5-fltGkI/AAAAAAAAA_E/BfEx9nR_qPU/s1600/SNC00976.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy5-fltGkI/AAAAAAAAA_E/BfEx9nR_qPU/s400/SNC00976.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Forgot who took this picture. But i look retarded in it.</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">I should put more retarded pictures of me...</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Fjt5oxI/AAAAAAAAA_M/kl4cMSvHbVA/s1600/SNC00984.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6Fjt5oxI/AAAAAAAAA_M/kl4cMSvHbVA/s400/SNC00984.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Tried on this posh looking hat at Nichii...</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6g0zvf8I/AAAAAAAAA_k/tU8YIw05a14/s1600/SNC01003.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy6g0zvf8I/AAAAAAAAA_k/tU8YIw05a14/s400/SNC01003.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">My brother's sunglasses...</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Cool shades yo..</span></div><div align="center" class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy63lOBCMI/AAAAAAAAA_8/TfY1Mc2MGW0/s1600/SNC01019.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy63lOBCMI/AAAAAAAAA_8/TfY1Mc2MGW0/s400/SNC01019.jpg" width="300" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Tried on this dress the other day while shopping</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Found this at OG if im not wrong.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Didnt buy it cos it was 90 bucks.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Dont have that kind of money to splurge on ONE dress..</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Nice or not??? =) SAY NICE!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy35SiaV8I/AAAAAAAAA80/LzZPxV39QxY/s1600/SNC00819.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGy35SiaV8I/AAAAAAAAA80/LzZPxV39QxY/s400/SNC00819.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Took this picture from the bus stop at TPC.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">The sky looked awesome then. Thought i could capture it.</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">___________________________________________</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE PICTURES &amp; the stories behind them pictures.. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">You better fucking enjoy it. I spent lots of time putting up this pictures...!! </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Half my work day gone... And i was bored while waiting for the pictures to load!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">Fuck you if you didnt enjoy it... </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzmeNyl-DI/AAAAAAAABAc/7op52TSNk3w/s1600/fuckyoumuch.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="261" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzmeNyl-DI/AAAAAAAABAc/7op52TSNk3w/s400/fuckyoumuch.JPG" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzoBuQOt0I/AAAAAAAABAk/fkzSaaxs0C0/s1600/KIDDIN%27.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="368" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGzoBuQOt0I/AAAAAAAABAk/fkzSaaxs0C0/s400/KIDDIN%27.bmp" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">GOOD BYE PEOPLE!!</span> </span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-6543187404311852566?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-13168429371822610442010-08-18T10:19:00.000+08:002010-08-18T10:19:09.011+08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><span style="color: black;">I'm not a die-hard fan of Korean dramas and series. Never was, never will be ...&nbsp;But once in awhile i enjoy a little korean drama. Especially when my mum doesnt sleep just to watch it. I wanna see how good is it, so i follow her and watch. Apparently, because of that habit i have now come across the awesomest Korean drama series EVER, so far... It's called <strong><em>PASTA</em></strong>.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">It's about chefs' lives at a high-class dining restaurant and talks about the cute love story of a male head chef and an aspiring female chef. They slowly fall in love and yeah.. It's funny cos they cant show it in the kitcehn cos he's the head chef and he was the one that came up with the "No-BGR" rule or anyone involved in BGR will be fired. But soon they couldnt stand the attraction between each other and yeah.. I stopped there... </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I dunno. The show reminded me of some stuff. And reminded me, that sometimes Korean guys are fucking hott!! They have really nice bods... Especially the chefs in the show. I dunno. But maybe because of the cute little romance blossoming between the head chef and the lead girl in the show. I also fell in love with the leading male character of the show. His real name? LEE SUN GYUN.... My current fantasy boyf. He just has this MANLY charm about him. Maybe cos he's always shouting and scolding. But he's cute. =)</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">You people should watch it. It made me wanna have a <strike>kind of complicated</strike> romance again. Just to feel like as if it's my first time in love again. =)</span><br /><br /><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1nFHJ4RI/AAAAAAAAA6M/VxbBTNqjzc8/s1600/pasta3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="311" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1nFHJ4RI/AAAAAAAAA6M/VxbBTNqjzc8/s400/pasta3.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span style="color: black;"></span><br /><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1j7v7yJI/AAAAAAAAA6E/68W3al7tTZk/s1600/MTTQFCA9MPFN2CAW8EOQUCABG43UICA031DCLCAYI5WHFCAFEMMAVCARK7KS1CAJ53KNACA35EI1FCA32JWO1CAEP2Q3PCAL6P1PWCAYUFQ6KCAI38YOSCAO4QDTYCARI5CKVCAO5AX65CAML18QWCA0WXVAA.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="265" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1j7v7yJI/AAAAAAAAA6E/68W3al7tTZk/s400/MTTQFCA9MPFN2CAW8EOQUCABG43UICA031DCLCAYI5WHFCAFEMMAVCARK7KS1CAJ53KNACA35EI1FCA32JWO1CAEP2Q3PCAL6P1PWCAYUFQ6KCAI38YOSCAO4QDTYCARI5CKVCAO5AX65CAML18QWCA0WXVAA.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1koJywfI/AAAAAAAAA6I/5DRH6PBkh3Q/s1600/pasta-cast-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="292" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1koJywfI/AAAAAAAAA6I/5DRH6PBkh3Q/s400/pasta-cast-2.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">LEE SUN GYUN!! </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">HE looks good in Chef uniform. </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And he has this boyish, yet manly look.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGtADrgEMwI/AAAAAAAAA6c/saHWMTAz-Zs/s1600/tumblr_l69pftnPC11qzdh9u.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGtADrgEMwI/AAAAAAAAA6c/saHWMTAz-Zs/s1600/tumblr_l69pftnPC11qzdh9u.gif" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>AWESOME. My BOYYFWWEEEN...</strong> </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1jtbGdeI/AAAAAAAAA6A/mhMSVxe-eF0/s1600/lee+sun+gyun.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1jtbGdeI/AAAAAAAAA6A/mhMSVxe-eF0/s400/lee+sun+gyun.jpg" width="362" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1iNLPEdI/AAAAAAAAA58/eb2bZdhh8t8/s1600/korea-entertainment-073-pasta.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs1iNLPEdI/AAAAAAAAA58/eb2bZdhh8t8/s400/korea-entertainment-073-pasta.jpg" width="331" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">And these guys!!!</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;">ARE THE CHEFS?? Bet you girls wana have a go at them huh? LOL.</span></div><br /><br /><div class="" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">OMFG.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGtAf_Y8KdI/AAAAAAAAA6g/P01c0UmGBrk/s1600/tumblr_l69peolp7H1qzdh9u.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" ox="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGtAf_Y8KdI/AAAAAAAAA6g/P01c0UmGBrk/s1600/tumblr_l69peolp7H1qzdh9u.gif" /></a><span style="color: black;"></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">IF i had a fantasy about gang bang... These&nbsp;guys are IT man!!</span></div><div class="" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">LOL. Wonder if they're good in bed. </span></div><div class="" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">How can anyone look at that? And not think about bedding them?</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Or be their girlf for at least a day or a week?</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;">Please refer to picture below for reference on how many times i would like them to "be with me" ..&nbsp; ;)</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_7-0TASI/AAAAAAAAA6Y/rDhwfDJtdmQ/s1600/tumblr_l6vxx5mmyf1qzuhd2o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_7-0TASI/AAAAAAAAA6Y/rDhwfDJtdmQ/s400/tumblr_l6vxx5mmyf1qzuhd2o1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Craaaap.... Alright. So yesterday was shopping again </span><span style="color: black;">with Bryan and Mum. Bryan was my fashion advisor. Bought new shoes. =) Studded pumps. Bought a cool-looks-comfy pyjamas. Bought a couple of tops. And tried on loads of clothes. =) ROBINSONS SALES YO. Niceeeeee! =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Today Im going down to Idemitsu to sign my appointment letter. Am excited. Am nervous. Some things i need to clear up with them before i start work.. =)</span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">Tuesday and wedenesday, next week will probably see me spending time with my family at MBS. =) <span style="font-size: xx-small;">So maybe ill feel sick tuesday morning and go see a doctor and then recover before lunch. =) Wonder what sickness ill get on tuesday. Tsk tsk... <strike>Bad habit to be able to predict when i get sick when im suppose to work.. =\</strike></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">If only.... I want rich husband.. Dont mind being a stay home wife. Sleep all day. Get fat and ugly. My husband can go fuck around for all i care. As long as he gives me money and lets me use the money however i want to. And also, love me immensely... =) Fuck around for all i care... A loyal/faithful dick? Doesnt exists anymore.. =) <strike>Its the heart that matters....</strike> </span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_wsPI0SI/AAAAAAAAA6Q/O0jmNoeB7xg/s1600/tumblr_l6i9g2iUtk1qzko63o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="200" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_wsPI0SI/AAAAAAAAA6Q/O0jmNoeB7xg/s400/tumblr_l6i9g2iUtk1qzko63o1_500.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_1qd7dhI/AAAAAAAAA6U/Y0W4XqA95Os/s1600/tumblr_l6p8ziX0z11qzr04eo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="252" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGs_1qd7dhI/AAAAAAAAA6U/Y0W4XqA95Os/s400/tumblr_l6p8ziX0z11qzr04eo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>Love love love...</strong> <strike>You're a bitch you're a bitch you're a bitch ....</strike></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>Work work work...</strong> <strike>You're a slut you're a slut you're a slut ...</strike></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>Life life life...</strong> <strike>You're a whore you're a whore you're a whore ....</strike></span></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: black;">You? You 're either a <strong>FUCKER</strong> or a <strong>SUCKER</strong>. Choose... =) There's no other way... In time to come, every one becomes a fucker or a sucker... It's part and parcel of life.. Deal with it. &nbsp;=)</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-1316842937182261044?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Mandyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08947510467794995607noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759253.post-73119138866849262622010-08-17T11:48:00.001+08:002010-08-17T11:51:42.677+08:00<span style="color: black;">I actually wanted to put up some extracts from the book "Leftovers"... But i realise... There's just too many words... So decided not to... =) Maybe in future when im out of words and i remember... LOL...</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">=) </span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">I feel better today. Don't know why. Maybe i slept well... No tossing and turning.. No fantasizing about perfect life while falling asleep. No tears. So, considered good night... =D</span><br /><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFaUPlCyI/AAAAAAAAA5M/dY61HZOQbQw/s1600/tumblr_l6lywlFjh51qa13gio1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="351" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFaUPlCyI/AAAAAAAAA5M/dY61HZOQbQw/s400/tumblr_l6lywlFjh51qa13gio1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="color: black;">But isnt it greeeaaaat?? First thing my Boss came in and say "Mandy next time dont park there ok? Park downstairs.." The carpark downstairs far sia... And if rain must walk under rain... And if sunny no shelter.. FUCK.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: black;">Then after that, the first thing my manager came to do was to fuck the production people that i was talking to. Because they screwed up a prototype. So he was in a bad mood and kept complaining to me about how fucked up it is to be him. Then, when i gave him the documents to sign, he looked at me and said "Wah without you i how ah?" Then, i felt a slight pinch of guilt for leaving this company. But well, we gotta do what we gotta do... =\ This company seriously won't have much place for me to go. And it's a fucked up working place. The bosses and superiors arent exactly the sane type. No system. And stuff... =\</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong>FORGET THAT... </strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFWMuaqXI/AAAAAAAAA5E/5nooW-plKRY/s1600/tumblr_l2mcgfU2RF1qzwyfio1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" ox="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFWMuaqXI/AAAAAAAAA5E/5nooW-plKRY/s400/tumblr_l2mcgfU2RF1qzwyfio1_500.jpg" width="287" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #cc0000;"><strong>I'm determined to stay happy today..&nbsp; =)</strong></span></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFquY5KsI/AAAAAAAAA5c/Gobpzx5y9r0/s1600/tumblr_l74sjjuLOM1qzwyfio1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="147" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFquY5KsI/AAAAAAAAA5c/Gobpzx5y9r0/s400/tumblr_l74sjjuLOM1qzwyfio1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFgo9p_II/AAAAAAAAA5U/3ke_9SUHHzI/s1600/tumblr_l6uvrr20h61qzr04eo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="251" ox="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoFgo9p_II/AAAAAAAAA5U/3ke_9SUHHzI/s400/tumblr_l6uvrr20h61qzr04eo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoF-XrzidI/AAAAAAAAA5s/NEO5ycyZIvU/s1600/tumblr_l70uweDiEM1qd0e8lo1_400.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="283" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoF-XrzidI/AAAAAAAAA5s/NEO5ycyZIvU/s400/tumblr_l70uweDiEM1qd0e8lo1_400.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>I want to be happy.... =)</strong></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoGmcUzIOI/AAAAAAAAA50/KjjE66Y7POk/s1600/tumblr_l5ybtcnJ4h1qzr04eo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="308" ox="true" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7SdI109G1io/TGoGmcUzIOI/AAAAAAAAA50/KjjE66Y7POk/s400/tumblr_l5ybtcnJ4h1qzr04eo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xgykPh7Cvdo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xgykPh7Cvdo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="color: black;"><strong>Songs stuck in my head... =)</strong></span><br /><br /><strong>BYE, Love... &nbsp;</strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6759253-7311913886684926262?l=mandy-low.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>